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    New here
    MollytheMilkCow posted:
    Just wanted to say Hello,never posted about my eating disoder
    before. But today feeling a little lost I'm 43 and have battled this
    since I was fourteen. I have good days and bad days. My ED got really bad when I lost my dad in 96 because I had to deal with all
    the issues I hadn't dealt with for years. Now I have a hard time
    understanding my eating disorder or if I even have one. I am in
    treatment for depression and I have two feeding tubes that I don't
    use like I should. I have a team of doctors, but I can't seem to not
    see myself as fat. I am 5'2 and weigh 88 pounds and want to lose
    more. I throw-up once or twice a day, not really a binge eater just
    anything to throw-up. I take exlax everyday10 to 15 and watch what I drink and eat. I feel better if I can eat as little as a couple of crackers. I have to get blood at least everyother month because my hymo. drops. I guess what makes it hard for me is I go the the doctor and they do blood work and it comes back not really that bad. And I thing, okay, I can keep doing what I'm doing because something would show up. What has got me so upset is my latest blood work showed my bad cholesterol high and my good cholesterol good and I don't understand if you don't eat how can that be? I know it seems silly, but it really worries me, am I getting fat? Because that is what I see, I hate the way I look, I even get up in the middle of the night and see if my smaller size clothes still fit. It hard, my meds don't help this, I really think I am going crazy. Does anyone else have problems this?
    Chris_WebMD_Staff responded:
    Hi Molly! I know you will find great support on this Member Created Community, called Eating Disorders .
    Please feel free to copy and paste this post there.
    I hope that helps.

    He who has hope has everything.
    - Proverb

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