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How Do I Get My Parents To Start Taking My Anxiety Seriously?
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AnxiousAndConfused posted:
I'm a 21 year old college student and to save money I'm going to school close to my parents so I can live at home. There are specific things and actions that I've mentioned on multiple occasions that will actually set off an anxiety attack or panic attack. Whenever I bring things up I'm either brushed off, told to not be so sensitive or even yelled at usually followed by the individual leaving the room. I am to the point where for the last year I've kept most of my anxiety to myself... but as of late it's starting to boil over. I understand not moving out so we can save money but is it really worth me locking myself in my room in a near constant state of emotion overload?

I don't know where to begin with talking to my mom and eventually my dad about this but if it doesn't happen soon I'll be begging random friends to let me stay with them. Help?

P.S. If I had the money or a job I'd just move out. My parents always said they didn't want me to work while in school, that school was my job, but now I feel trapped.
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Patricia Farrell, PhD responded:
I'm not sure how these conversations begin, but your post that you are "either brushed off, told to not be so sensitive or even yelled at usually followed by the individual leaving the room," leads me to believe there is a major problem in communicating regarding emotional content in your home. Has it always been this way? I ask this because the current state of the economy has made many people more anxious now and less able to handle the difficulties and anxieties of others.


Perhaps one way to begin to resolve this situation is for you to sit down alone with your mother in a quiet area where the 2 of you will be able to talk about what is troubling you. Let your mother know that you need to talk to her and that you need her help. She wants you to succeed in school, tell her that's exactly what you want too, but this requires some help from her other than providing you with a place to stay while you are obtaining your degree. Being able to discuss these things will enable you to concentrate more on your studies and to be the good student you know she wants you to be. Every student needs support, both physical and emotional and you can't just give one without the other.


I know that it must have reached a very difficult point for you to have posted to this board and I do hope that your mother does understand that you are reaching out to her.


I hope she does respond and that this conversation does take place with some positive progress. For yourself, why not begin to use some relaxation breathing so that you can begin to help yourself with some of this anxiety? We have a video tutorial in our Tips column and I would recommend that you watch it and begin to use this technique right away, every day whenever you feel you are going to begin to become anxious.


Dr. Farrell
 
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gonnafindaway responded:
Hello college student. i am far older than you but went through the anxiety so please don't wait to tell your parents . when i told mine they became my biggest help. they can't help if they don't know.
 
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Cjack1990 responded:
if you feel like it's a little tough telling them or hard to explain, try writing out a letter to them and write down everything you are thinking or feeling. One thing about anxiety that I have learned is to NEVER hold anything in. Anxiety is stress and holding in things is even more stressful making things worse. The only reason why my parents understand it is because my mom has been dealing with it for years. It's hard to understand something when you don't feel the same thing, you know? I'm not sure if a letter will be helpful but its better than just not saying anything. If you feel that they still arent understanding, find a close friend or relative to talk to when you start to feel anxious, try writing in a journal also. Counslers are always very helpful, but I understand money is very tight and I, myself, am unable to visit a counsler because I can't afford it right now.
 
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An_245378 responded:
Do not be confused .. I think I am able to help; and a lot !!! I am going to send a couple links for you to review and then PLEASE contact me @ gio-rossini@comcast.net


http://www.myhealthnewsdaily.com/2458-anxiety-linked-high-iq.html


http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001915/


Sincerely Yours;
Giovanni
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to An_245378's response:
Thank you for reaching out to help another, Giovanni.

We encourage our members to talk with each other on the community here rather than soliciting emails, at least until they've had a long period of getting to know one another here.

Hope you'll keep talking here.
 
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gio_01 replied to Caprice_WebMD_Staff's response:
ABSOLUTELY !! Thank You Caprice !! .... I am very much willing to help and reach out. I have been affected with the above disorder for about 25 years.


Sincerely Yours;
Giovanni
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to gio_01's response:
You're very welcome, Giovanni!


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