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paramedic6031 posted:
Need to lay some background first. My wife is a CHD pt and has had many heart caths, gallbladder surgery where she was extubated went into CHF and had to be reintubated. through all this when she goes in for any procedure, I begin to micro analize things and ALWAYS expect the worst. This has becam worse since she had the problem with the CHF. I have the greatest fear of her going into CHF and not being able to come out. This along with my fathers death 9 yrs ago from an anurism has made me a roving maniac when she is sick in the hospital or goes in for some surgery or procedure. What would be a good starting point for dealing with these issues and who would be good to start with, my PCP or Cardiologist? Any help will be fgreatly appreciated.
Reid Wilson, PhD responded:
Hey paramedic6031-
I'd start with looking at how you worry. Your mind is telling you that when you worry, you're problem-solving. But that's not happening. Worry is actually problem generating. When you hear yourself worry, you need to decide whether it is a "signal" (something you can literally do something about right now) or "noise" (repetitious, unproductive thoughts that freak you out). Certainly your wife's heart problems are going to make you physically anxious. But it is no help to you or her for you to worry unnecessarily. Practice letting go of those noisy worries, even though you will be left with physical anxiety. Here is a link to my website that offers tips for people who worry. All three steps there will be useful to you.

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