Needs Help With Mom's Health
An_249592 posted:
I'm very worried about my mother's health. My father passed away 6 years ago. She is 62 years old, obese (over 300 lbs), and has suffered since her 30s from severe nerve damage in her spine due to a work accident. She is unable to exercise heavily. She is in pain just walking around. She sleeps on and off from 7 AM to 3 PM, waking often because of her pain. She suffers from depression and although she is very friendly, she only socializes with me (I live at home) and a few close relatives and friends who visit or call. I'm not sure if she takes painkillers, but I fear that they'll make her "hazy" and that she may trip and fall. She generally only eats in the evening (plain sandwiches) and does not eat excessively. Beyond diet suggestions, I feel powerless. I love my mom very much, and I don't know where to even begin in helping her achieve better physical and mental health. She's a wonderful person who I hope has not given up on herself. I'm in my mid-twenties, and I feel this struggle beginning to have a seriously negative effect on me as well and on my worldview.
2 Replies |Watch This Discussion | Report This| Share this:Needs Help With Mom's HealthI'm very worried about my mother's health. My father passed away 6 years ago. She is 62 years old, obese (over 300 lbs), and has suffered since her 30s from severe nerve damage in her spine due to a work accident. She is unable to exercise heavily. She is in pain just walking around. She sleeps on and off from 7 AM to 3 PM, waking often because of her pain. She suffers from depression and although she is very friendly, she only socializes with me (I live at home) and a few close relatives and friends who visit or call. I'm not sure if she takes painkillers, but I fear that they'll make her "hazy" and that she may trip and fall. She generally only eats in the evening (plain sandwiches) and does not eat excessively. Beyond diet suggestions, I feel powerless. I love my mom very much, and I don't know where to even begin in helping her achieve better physical and mental health. She's a wonderful person who I hope has not given up on herself. I'm in my mid-twenties, and I feel this struggle beginning to have a seriously negative effect on me as well and on my worldview.<br /><br />
davedsel57 responded:
Hello.
I am sorry for your situation. What you need to do is to encourage your mother to change to a healthier lifestyle. She will only change if she wants to change. Encourage your mother to see her doctor for a complete physical and go with her into the exam room if she will let you. Learn all you can about healthy living and try to be an example for your mother. Tell her how much you would miss her if she passed away too early from this unhealthy lifestyle. Be honest with her when you tell her how much this is disturbing you.
It is frustrating to watch a loved one suffer. Just be there for her and help her as much as you can and as much as she will let you.
I am sorry for your situation. What you need to do is to encourage your mother to change to a healthier lifestyle. She will only change if she wants to change. Encourage your mother to see her doctor for a complete physical and go with her into the exam room if she will let you. Learn all you can about healthy living and try to be an example for your mother. Tell her how much you would miss her if she passed away too early from this unhealthy lifestyle. Be honest with her when you tell her how much this is disturbing you.
It is frustrating to watch a loved one suffer. Just be there for her and help her as much as you can and as much as she will let you.
Click on my user name or avatar picture to read my story.
Blessings,
-Dave
Blessings,
-Dave
Report This| Share this:Needs Help With Mom's HealthHello.<br /><br />I am sorry for your situation. What you need to do is to encourage your mother to change to a healthier lifestyle. She will only change if she wants to change. Encourage your mother to see her doctor for a complete physical and go with her into the exam room if she will let you. Learn all you can about healthy living and try to be an example for your mother. Tell her how much you would miss her if she passed away too early from this unhealthy lifestyle. Be honest with her when you tell her how much this is disturbing you.<br /><br />It is frustrating to watch a loved one suffer. Just be there for her and help her as much as you can and as much as she will let you.
bj1208 responded:
HI and welcome to the support group -
Dave has given you great advise, as always. I just wanted to add a couple of things~~
If your mother refuses to see her primary doc see if you have a dietitian at your grocery store. They can offer advise on a lot of different lifestyles for healthier living. I speak to the one at our grocery store on my father-n-laws diet as he is a diabetic. She has helped me learn so much about diabetes, proper sugars and how to count/divide what would be a intake for his foods/substitutions etc.,
You may be able to speak with your mom's primary doc's nurse to see if they can suggest some options for your mom. One of those would be for her to see a good spine specialist either Orthopedic or Neurosurgeon - but must be sure they are spine specialist as they are the only ones that can accurately diagnose spine problems. A X-ray/MRI/CT Scan will need to be done. I would check to see if there is a big university teaching hospital near you. I've heard some have a new MRI machine where you sit in it and it rotates around to get the pictures needed - as you say your mother is very large I don't believe she will be able to have one done in the regular machines.
Another would be for a good pain management physician - I see a PHYSIATRIST Pain Specialist - they go deeper into pain management based on patients' needs.
http://www.spineuniverse.com/treatments/what-physiatrist
During the diagnosis period, the sine specialist may refer your mom for Physical Therapy/Chiropractic treatments where they can work with her and show her proper exercising techniques.
If you can it would be beneficial for you to take her to her appointments this way you know what all is going on and also to help her with exercises at home (maybe do them with her to help encourage her).
The more you show interest in her health the more she may want to get something done about it.
Hope this helps - keep us posted what you find out~~
Dave has given you great advise, as always. I just wanted to add a couple of things~~
If your mother refuses to see her primary doc see if you have a dietitian at your grocery store. They can offer advise on a lot of different lifestyles for healthier living. I speak to the one at our grocery store on my father-n-laws diet as he is a diabetic. She has helped me learn so much about diabetes, proper sugars and how to count/divide what would be a intake for his foods/substitutions etc.,
You may be able to speak with your mom's primary doc's nurse to see if they can suggest some options for your mom. One of those would be for her to see a good spine specialist either Orthopedic or Neurosurgeon - but must be sure they are spine specialist as they are the only ones that can accurately diagnose spine problems. A X-ray/MRI/CT Scan will need to be done. I would check to see if there is a big university teaching hospital near you. I've heard some have a new MRI machine where you sit in it and it rotates around to get the pictures needed - as you say your mother is very large I don't believe she will be able to have one done in the regular machines.
Another would be for a good pain management physician - I see a PHYSIATRIST Pain Specialist - they go deeper into pain management based on patients' needs.
http://www.spineuniverse.com/treatments/what-physiatrist
During the diagnosis period, the sine specialist may refer your mom for Physical Therapy/Chiropractic treatments where they can work with her and show her proper exercising techniques.
If you can it would be beneficial for you to take her to her appointments this way you know what all is going on and also to help her with exercises at home (maybe do them with her to help encourage her).
The more you show interest in her health the more she may want to get something done about it.
Hope this helps - keep us posted what you find out~~
~~ Click on my name or picture and read my story ~~
Take care ~~ God Bless ~~
~~ Joy ~~
Take care ~~ God Bless ~~
~~ Joy ~~
Report This| Share this:Needs Help With Mom's HealthHI and welcome to the support group -<br /><br />Dave has given you great advise, as always. I just wanted to add a couple of things~~<br /><br />If your mother refuses to see her primary doc see if you have a dietitian at your grocery store. They can offer advise on a lot of different lifestyles for healthier living. I speak to the one at our grocery store on my father-n-laws diet as he is a diabetic. She has helped me learn so much about diabetes, proper sugars and how to count/divide what would be a intake for his foods/substitutions etc., <br /><br />You may be able to speak with your mom's primary doc's nurse to see if they can suggest some options for your mom. One of those would be for her to see a good spine specialist either Orthopedic or Neurosurgeon - but must be sure they are spine specialist as they are the only ones that can accurately diagnose spine problems. A X-ray/MRI/CT Scan will need to be done. I would check to see if there is a big university teaching hospital near you. I've heard some have a new MRI machine where you sit in it and it rotates around to get the pictures needed - as you say your mother is very large I don't believe she will be able to have one done in the regular machines.<br /><br />Another would be for a good pain management physician - I see a PHYSIATRIST Pain Specialist - they go deeper into pain management based on patients' needs.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.spineuniverse.com/treatments/what-physiatrist">http://www.spineuniverse.com/treatments/what-physiatrist</a><br /><br />During the diagnosis period, the sine specialist may refer your mom for Physical Therapy/Chiropractic treatments where they can work with her and show her proper exercising techniques.<br /><br />If you can it would be beneficial for you to take her to her appointments this way you know what all is going on and also to help her with exercises at home (maybe do them with her to help encourage her).<br /><br />The more you show interest in her health the more she may want to get something done about it. <br /><br />Hope this helps - keep us posted what you find out~~
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