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aprilrose9 posted:
I am having a very rough time and just need to feel there is someone, someone, anyone out there who might understand. Please, don't suggest counseling, I am a health care professional myself and can tell you, after more than 25 years of chronic pain, 4 back surgeryx4, medications of every kind, we all just go through these periods. Besides, I have not been too impressed with the few counselors I was forced to see via certain pain control clinics. One told me after being sick with pneumonia for two weeks, she now understood what I was going through.
Anyway, I just need some support. The last 6-7 years have been very difficult. I was bedridden for 95% of the time and the pain I was in was uncontrollable no matter what any of my MD's tried. It would take 5 minutes using my cane, every wall and piece of furniture to get to the bathroom. I don;t know how I lived through the pain.
The problem is, and I have noticed this in the past, after shorter pain cycles that lasted 4-6 months, I am so blue. After shorter pain cycles involving months of bedrest, it would take me a while to pick up my life. Feeling, "now where was I". After so many years, During which we moved due to forclosure, my husband cannot find work despite an MBA and lean black belt lean six sigma (what ever it's called?) and in the 6-7 years so many friends have moved or just forgotten about me. I had been in so much pain, I could not sleep, watch TV or even look at a magazine. So yes, I guess you could say I did't make much of a friend myself
My husband works at a factory now, making ugh money. We always say, that at least it keeps a roof over our head, and for that we are grateful.
I know this is long, and I probably seem like a whiner, but I must defend myself. I was injured within a couple of years of getting married. With 2 herniated discs and hardly able to stand, my husband wouldn't even help me walk to the car. I could barely walk and there was snow and ice on the ground. My in-laws have been nasty. "Why don't you push yourself?" "What do you mean, how can your back still hurt. You had back surgery." Now after all these years of my husband going out to bars and being out all night, he keeps talking about divorcing me. Maybe we would get along better if my almost 60yr old husband would quit tolling the bars.
The one area I never hear discussed by anyone in the health care profession is, the way an injury can shatter a patients life, kill their dreams and trap them in a bad life. The pain and suffering we go through is bad enough, but if it happens when you are in a bad marriage, it is all the worse.
If I haven't made all of you fall asleep reading this, I would like to hear some ideas from someone.
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bj1208 responded:
hi and welcome to the support group -

yes a spine injury, or any surgery or injury can shatter ones' life especially when we battle with chronic pains which always bring on depression. Some handle it better than others. I had one primary doc tell me "YOU DON"T LOOK LIKE UR IN PAIN" boy I would love to have hanged him!! I was working at the time and always had the right kind of make-up on so you couldn't see my dark circles under my eyes - then I had surgery and became disabled.

So, yes those of us on this site can and do understand what you are going thru.

One suggestion I have would be if you live in a large city see if there is a teaching university hospital. Make an appointment with the spine specialist - I think it would benefit you to be seen at one of these hospitals as they tend to have all the new treatments etc., and I think they will be able to help you

you can blog and let us know how you are doing, ask for advise or just to blow up - we are a support group and believe we are one of the best.

Please keep us posted how you are doing~~
~~ Click on my name or picture and read my story ~~

Take care ~~ God Bless ~~

~~ Joy ~~


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