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    trs1960 posted:
    Aprilerose9, I'm, Just curious if you've reveiwed the book we discuused. It hit me hard and educated me 10 fold about how the body works. How pain works with the ganglian and the brain stem as it then gets destributed to different sections of the brain. How plecicbos work in animals just in humans,But jnow t2 years later depresseied, in financial ruins, suffering sleep deprevistopmd, living out of a painl bottle of piills and other meds.
    The book; I really want your preofessional opnion on it,You opinoinrs from a nurse and a pateinnt. Your back ground I think may help make sense of it all. Kmowledge is power and lacking power we bread into anxiety. As a Nurse suffering pain I would love to hear your opinion.

    About me, I haven't posted much since we last spoke. I had high asperations and was a bit smitten with your knowledge, but I said things that hurt you, for that I am truly sorry. I thouhgt you to be a peer and in no way intend to insult you. You blew me away with your knowldge and real life stories
    I think I'm going to bow outmysell as I don't feel I'm doiing much to help. Everyone here needs to take charge of themselves, learn and use your doctors as tools

    Aprilrose9 you are a great person. You can help many here, If I offended you I will leave so you can come back and help


    PS I'm looking at pulling the plug soon and quitting work for disability I can't keep up and I pay for my own disabiliy insurance, The family weill get Obomacare anf my kids will get more grant money for scchool.We won't know hoe bad it is until Nancy Polozei has finishes her shopping spree...

    Good Bye all and God bless
    aprilrose9 responded:
    TRS1960--Hi Friend, So nice to hear from you. I wanted the book you recommended, in the old fashioned form. I normally order from one site and it was out. Ordered from another site via snail mail and it has yet to arrive at my doorstep.

    Trust me, if I was upset with you, I would talk it out. I cannot even think of anything you have said, that would bother me. I consider you a friend and have appreciated your help.

    The truth is, my pain level is down after 7 very terrible years. I have always struggled after a long pain period. In the past, a long pain period has been six months, not seven years.

    The truth is, I am more sad and not concerned about pain. If I spill the beans, I feel I will get a load of judgement piled on me. People have been less than sympathetic the last several years. We have had a recent death in the family, which has rocked our household. While I have been in pain for a long time, my husband has always been employed and at least we had food, shelter and cars.

    My very educated husband, lost his business. We have lost all that first he and I worked for, until I was injured and then all he worked for for decades. We once had a home over a half million dollars, beautiful furniture, a few expensive sports cars in the garage, stocks, retirement account and money in the bank. Please, stop groaning and hear me out.

    Both my husband and myself come from very simple backgrounds. I was raised by a single mother who struggled financially for my entire childhood. At ten, I cared for my 2yr old and 6yr old sisters, grocery shopped, cooked, cleaned, mowed the grass ect. In my spare time, I had to take all the babysitting jobs I could find in my area. I had to work for 35 cents per hour, so I would be in demand with all the mothers. After playing with the children and putting them to bed, I then washed dishes and cleaned. I was never allowed to be a kid.

    I worked two jobs to put myself through school. I thought my career would be my way out and I would not have to worry about money in adulthood. I was going to go to CRNA school, when I got hurt. I knew I would love the work and it completely suited my meticulous personality. I did not want to do it for the money, although the salary is about 170K right now. I knew my job was arduous and I did not want to get injured. Too late! Hurt myself before I could start school.

    My husband has not been able to find work. FOR TEN YEARS! We have lost everything: forclosed home, sold cars, stocks and burned through the savings years ago. We live in a dump. Yes, I know at least I am not homeless. We could not pay our rent last year and after selling everything the last ten years, I had nothing more to sell. Early on, I sold 50K of furniture, in a rush to get 6K so we could move into an apartment, have something to live on and give my husband time to find work.

    No one will hire my husband. He has an MBA and certified lean six sigma black belt. Who cares about and old guy in this economy?

    I know we all have a story to tell. But, after the childhood I went through, I wanted so much more for myself. I gave you the sanitized version of my childhood. Leaving out the death threats and the uglier parts.

    Do I not deserve to feel a little sorry for myself? Being bedridden for seven years, I was first, trying to survive. Now that I have come up for air, I am really seeing the fallout. Please cut me some slack. Just want to be sad for a little bit, but I am trying to start picking up the pieces.

    We all have so much to face. I read things here, that make me want to cry. I wish I could hug people through the screen. Thank goodness, nice people like you have reached out to me during this difficult time. Please, people do not write to me, telling me to get help. I am, just a little sad, with the death in the family, unemployment issue and the financial things.

    I have to add, I LOVED my job and considered it a privilege to take care of patients. I really miss it!
    trs1960 replied to aprilrose9's response:
    It's a story that is far too similar to many of us in here. Arestotle said, "Pain destroys that whom suffers it."

    I work for a company that is huge on Six Sigma. They are also huge and probably monitor what I post here so I'll leave it at that.

    I am so glad I didn't offend you, I can not tell you how much that means to me. Please vent all you want and I will not groan...I may moan a little in pain, but I noticed your caring ways and educated take on life right away. If it were up to me I would make you a moderator here. I can here in your tone the compasion you have for yourself and others that suffer as we do. This is a true altruististic kindness that knows no bounds, My story is similar, but I wont go on too much. Suffice to say I'm about to lose my house and have two brillant teenage daughters(says I) that I love dearly and have tried my best to work my hardest to help them succeed, Both have above 4.0 GPAs and I want them to go to college my quest to continue work has only harmed my family by putting my self deeper in debt by staying off of disability and paying taxes and taxes, The pain succumbed by working leaves me little left of a man, a father and a husband, The paper money leaves little grant money for college tuition while being on disability would show little income or AGI. With their grades and sports they could probably get full ride scholarships.

    I could go on, but we all share the same storys. Chronic pain takes the lives of many people and many would say we are lucky to be victorious.To tell you the truth I don't know if I'm winning or lossing. I think I'm going to ask my doc for a few weeks off work to try and think about my life and my future,

    Thank you for your reply, it means a lot to me.

    Best wishes and God Bless.

    aprilrose9 replied to trs1960's response:
    Dear TRS 1960, Good Day! You have so much to consider at this time. How does your wife feel ? My heart goes out to you and your family. You have so many things going on in your life.

    As parents, you must be immensely proud of the intelligent young women you have raised. No easy feat, especially at this time. The girls education and future, must be a heavy concern in your decision with work and disability.

    I know it is hard to speak in specifics, and your disability attorney knows best as you proceed, but I can hear the conflict you are facing the last couple of days.

    I I do not know anything about going from work to disability. Only, it sounds like a multitude of factors will be involved as you make a decision in the next couple of weeks. I will keep your family in my prayers and hope the decision comes to you in peace.

    Looking foreward to my book arriving in the next couple of days. Thanks for the reminder, since I forgot to track the package, until you brought up the subject. I read about the Dr.s education, hospital affiliations, personal background and the book reviews prior to ordering the book. All of it sounds good, but I am curious about the "funny" part people have refered to in their reviews.

    My dog injured himself a few days ago. My back was turned, so I didn't see what happened--only heard the screech. His personality completely changed the last couple of days. Normally he is high energy and a barker. For the last three days, he has been quiet, refuses to go up and down stairs and up or off furniture. Of course, if he was in distress, I would have taken him to the vet. It appeared to be a pulled muscle and lasted 48 hours. Just wanted to point out the personality change, despite the "non-emotional" component that is supposed to be a factor with response to pain. Cannot wait to hear what the book may discuss on the subject.

    Take Care, Aprilrose9
    trs1960 replied to aprilrose9's response:
    Got to keep this short. I have disability insurance so I would make almost as much money. Of course things are never that simple, but my primary doc has asked me to please stop working while I can still enjoy life. He's been my doc for about 20 years so that's almost 8 years prior to my injury.

    Turns out the pain doc has a new PA and I'm scheduled to see her. Normally I enjoy PAs as they spend more time with you and get to know you. But today I really need to talk to the doc. I am going to ask for two weeks off work to try and get in control. Then see the doc and make the hard decision.

    Bless you all (hey the Pope is off the job so ill fill in for him.)

    trs1960 replied to trs1960's response:
    What I was saying is that I have disability insurance that would pay my salary (almost) until I'm 65. In two years ill have to find insurance for wife and daughters who will hopefully be in college.

    Helpful Tips

    try yoga for sure the positions and stretches help alot. u will feel relief but do not stop just continue doing it More
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