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    So I went to the Pain Doc
    trs1960 posted:
    Actually I went to see his brand new PA. I love PAs as they typically are kind and sincere with more time to get to know you. But, today was like walking in at the end of a movie and not knowing if its the good guy or the bad guy about to fall off the cliff?

    She did write me two weeks off work so I can get my head on straight. I think I kind of scared here though. She asked if my current level of meds keep me "happy". I told her with a bit too much reality, " half my back is fused, my blood pressure is spiked I hurt like hell and I'm exhausted... Nothing to do with that spells "happy!"

    I went on to explain its not for lack of meds and the last thing I want are more.. It's just that I'm done. 12 years, 12 vertebrae and 24/7 pain. It's stress times a bazillion...ironically I am happy, but that happiness is buried beneath so much scar tissue it's hard to recognize. I told her everyone in my life is tired of hearing that I hurt and I have worn that out no matter how hard I try to be the stoic. Sure they have empathy, but it is the natural order of things to let the strong survive and the weak perish. There in lies our struggle to be a societal animal or just a mammal with opposable thumbs and speech.

    She was agreeable, but I can't help notice that the warm smile that defined her face when she walked in and introduced herself turned to somewhat of a look of terror as she wrote out scripts and inched towards the door...

    bj1208 responded:
    Hey Tim -

    Yep it's always good to meet new PA's - I love them too - the one I have is really great - though I've been going to same place since the end of 2008 and I know almost all the staff (big office with several Doc's doing different areas of treatment) they also have clinical trials for new meds etc. which they have asked me a couple of times to do it. it's for a new Hydrocodone med which I was not too impressed with it and kept asking how much of that med would I have to take to equal the amounts I take for morphine and oxycodone each day. I also reminded them I get cluster headaches so that pretty much threw me out of the trials as that is one of the side effects of this new med.

    I saw my PA last week and yesterday I had appt to go in and get shots in my lower back - hate it when they feel my back as they press hard etc to find the "spots" cause I always end up in tears - but I got my pain shots (pain med mixed with numbing agent) and am glad I did. My hubby's niece her hubby and their daughter are moving in with us til they can get on their feet out here - moving from VA so I cleaned up one spare bedroom and got it ready. The other spare bedroom will be my hubby's and daughter's responsibility as it's mainly their junk in there!! LOL I got in our hottub last nite too so that really helped. Will do same tonite just to make sure I don't get too sore or hurt too much - so far I'm doing really well considering what all I did.

    anyway - I know how you feel when you see a new PA - I can remember my first appt at this place where I saw the PA first then the doc. they both saw how I was walking where I dragged my left leg/foot so they had me see their one doc that does the EMG tests (he's one that does pain shots too) so he tested me and that's when I found out I have nerve damage. they sent me to get fitted for leg brace for left leg. So I was really impressed with their office staff.

    I go back on Monday for another set of shots and then I will see the Chiro after that - my back is so bad right now. It's stiff as a board on the left side from the top of my T-discs down to L5 and some on right.

    Then the following week I go in for my EMG test - Ugh hate those but glad they only last a short time - I have both parts of test done this way they can tell which disc(s) are causing more problems.

    So anyway that's what I did all day yesterday - gonna take it easy today and not do a darn thing!! LOL

    Hope ur doing ok today - take care~~
    ~~ Click on my name or picture and read my story ~~

    Take care ~~ God Bless ~~

    ~~ Joy ~~
    trs1960 replied to bj1208's response:
    I like having a doc that knows me well. I saw previous pain doc until about 08. I loved him, but it was a 100 mile drive round trip. In the mean time a new pain doc started his practice about 5 miles from my office. I had two friends with spine injuries seeing him. After a year of good reports I switched. Both doctors I rank 10 on a scale of 10. My primary care doc has been taking care of me for nearly 20 years. He actually suggested I should quit work and take the disability. He's really nice and he is worried about my quality of life as I get older. I know he's right, it's just a hard decision. It's like boiling a frog in water. If you just keep pushing yourself a little harder you run the risk of not realizing you've gone too far until it's too late.

    God bless you Joy and good for you taking care of family!


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