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    I think I'm going to take a hietus from here...
    trs1960 posted:
    Every time I look in here I've monopolized al the threads, Dave is all but gone and I somehow feel responsible for that.

    You guys know what I think and the core members (including Dave) can answer anything as well as I.

    It's not my personal forum. Everyone is unique and needs different types of help. I think if I stay away, others can speak up.

    Best wishes to all of you and God Bless.

    I really care about you guys, if I am upset, it would only be that my own passion skewed my message. I am upset at no one else!
    I have a love for you guys that God understands, you probably understand, but few others (thank God) will ever know.

    With my deepest sincerity,

    davedsel2 responded:

    Your input is valuable to this community and would be missed. I have so much going on in my life right now I do not feel like replying as often as I once did. Plus, to be honest, I am tired of seeing all the spam, ads and even attacks. This entire site is no where as good as it was a few years ago. All WebMD communities have light activity and I believe it is due to the lack of adequate moderation and administration.
    Please click on my username or avatar picture to read my story.


    debs_bears responded:
    Tim I don't see a problem - certainly not with me. Sometimes there is only one person who might answer because they know all about that subject.

    I don't understand why you know think you have to leave cause you are answering posts - I thought that is what we do - we try to help others.

    I do not want to see you leave. You have always been a big help to me as well as others.

    There are many times others have helped me.
    It is my prayer that you have a Blessed Day in all that you do. ~~~Debbie~~~
    bj1208 responded:
    Tim don't go

    I love our chats and how we know what each other will say.

    You lay it on the line and you are very knowledgeable just like Dave, Debbie and myself - we all have different areas we know so much just from what has happened to us.

    I don't know what I would do if you were not here to poke fun at - and you do same to me.

    You do bring sunshine to the group and I would truly miss you, as I would if Dave or Debbie or any others would leave.

    Please stay - we need you - more than you think - {{{HUGS}}}
    ~~ Click on my name or picture and read my story ~~
    ~~ Joy ~~
    bj1208 responded:
    Tim - I also wanted to add there are some days that I'm in so much pain that I just can't get on here - and everyone ask where I'm at etc., and there have been some that have asked if they said something to upset me.

    No it's just one of those days - and I know I will be having that tomorrow cause yesterday afternoon I pulled weeds out of my flower bed, sprayed anti-fungus spray on my rose bushes and then put miracle grow down - all directly in the sun - I was so wore out I didn't even make it to bed, I slept sitting up in my recliner (still can't sleep on back) then I meet my cuz at a casino (half way point for us both) and spent 4 hours there - and I just got home so I know tomorrow I will be in so much pain.

    So everyone will know that if they don't see me responding to posts at least you all will know -

    Love to everyone~~
    ~~ Click on my name or picture and read my story ~~
    ~~ Joy ~~
    trs1960 replied to bj1208's response:
    I'll be reading. I just had a bad day I have a dear friend in MI. He's an engineer. He was the lead engineer for the 4th generation of the Corvette. His lumbar is collapsing, just had hip surgery, and a colostomy.

    He reached out to me for help. We've had many all night email sessions and some phone calls. I bought him my favorite book and sent it to him. Being an engineer and his wife a pharmacist I thought it would really hit home with him...he read it and didn't get anything out of it.

    My epiphany: we're all in our own place. Our pain is ours and we sometimes can't relate it to anyone else. He's acute and waiting for surgery to fuse his entire Lumbar and Sacrum together. I thought I could help more and I'm hurt that my best efforts failed him. I found the book after years of intractable pain. Suffering, struggling to find a reason to live. I was convinced my doctors were betraying me by not telling me why I hurt. I wanted to die so bad, but I promised God and my family I would never take my life...never!

    That promise literally saved my life...barely. I spent one night with a un to my head wondering what God would do if I broke my promise? I wondered what would be worse for my kids. I put the gun down and went to ER.

    So, I like to be up, I love looking at roses, but this is not funny sh_t!

    Oh I'm not giving up on him. I have few friends and those that I consider my friends I am fiercely loyal to. For me, with friendship comes responsibility.

    So I guess I'm just depressed. I'm working on my PC to just distract myself. I used to be very technical so tearing into computer hardware and rebuilding auto archive schemes is a thoughtless distraction.

    Coming here is a reminder.

    ...I'll be back and I'll be watching (reading).

    Love you guys (Dave, strictly plutonic )


    debs_bears replied to trs1960's response:
    Tim sorry to read about your friend - I do not know all there is to know about backs - but if you or he needs someone to talk to about the colostomy I will be here to help out in whatever way I can. I do belong to an excellent web site for ostomies. Or you could email me directly - how do I do that - I know I shouldn't post it here in the discussions?

    My prayers go out to your friend and family and you as well during this difficult time.
    It is my prayer that you have a Blessed Day in all that you do. ~~~Debbie~~~
    trs1960 replied to debs_bears's response:
    trs1960 replied to trs1960's response:
    I don't know if colostomy is correct. He had a colostomy bag for awhile (I think that's what it's called) and they've since put his intestines back together. He's (allegedly healing from that). He just had a hip replacement a month ago and his lumbar is collapsing (levoscoliosis) so he's supposed to be doing PT for the hip, but his Lumbar is completely impinging the nerves in his lumbar!

    I told him just stay healthy until the back surgery. Move as much as you can without hurting yourself. He sent me his MRI report and it's all there. He did say that my take on it was exactly what his doctor said almost verbatim. A little stenosis down low, but that doesn't scare me as only the cauda equina remains in the lumbar.

    I just thought the book would ring bells in his head. It was so cathartic for me as I came across epiphany after epiphany. Being an engineer I thought I knew how he would think...analytical, needing to know the why and the how. For me, I had to know. Its the only way I was able to convince my brain to quit listening to false pain signals...a Sisypheon challenge at best.

    To all, your words mean much.

    debs_bears replied to trs1960's response:
    Tim colostomy is correct - and when they put the intestines back in and hook him back up that is called a reversal. I am glad to hear at least that area is doing good.

    Sometimes people can't get rid of the bag like me and that is okay. I still get excited when people get reversed cause that means no bag.
    It is my prayer that you have a Blessed Day in all that you do. ~~~Debbie~~~
    trs1960 replied to debs_bears's response:
    Funny thong, late yesterday I sent my friend this: I almost didn't send because he said he was having a really good day and I didn't want him to fixate on his own anatomical problems.

    He sent back an admonition of an epiphany. He said the book made the 3D modeling make perfect sense and he was amazed at how he saw the anatomical model in a whole new was all making sense.

    He thanked me for all the support and said he wants to talk again pre-op.

    We email daily and banter constantly on an automotive message board. One that we've been over 12 years.

    debs_bears replied to trs1960's response:
    That site is cool - I book marked it for my use. Thank you. I am glad it all makes sense for your friend. Debbie
    It is my prayer that you have a Blessed Day in all that you do. ~~~Debbie~~~

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