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Husband is bipolar
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overthis1 posted:
My husband was diagnosed with bipolar rapid Cycle about 2 years ago, he is on celexa, and seroquel. Over the past 2 months, he is back to demanding RESPECT from me. He is Stuck on me not treating him with dignity and Respect. We have been to marriage counceling and individual. I am ready to move on with my life . I just cannot deal with this anymore. He tells me how bad of a wife I am all the time, and that my children and myself have broken his heart over and over. He screams obsenities in my face and infront of the children. He is always "leaving Me" , getting a divorce. He plays mind games all the time. We cant have a conversation because he doesnt care what I or anyone else has to say. He is always right and everything is my fault. Im just at my wits end. any suggestions?
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shania09 responded:
Sounds like he needs to get his meds adjusted again, or perhaps just another anti-depressant entirely. Does he go on like this for a long time? For me marriage is something u r supposed to be in it for "sickness and in health" but u r human and also his wife and noboduy needs to be feeling like they have to tiptoe on egg shells all the time. The children also do not need to be seeing this either. Maybe in the nest cycle, see if u 2 casn go to the therapist together and explain what he does to the tdoc and see what she says. Does he even say hes sorry when he cycles down again? I wish u luck hon!!
Just be yourself............Everyone else is already taken. The biggest mistake you can make is being afraid to make one...
 
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mattthecat responded:
overthis1 Welcome. I feel your pain i grew up in a bipolar family and would not recommend it to any one. But it also had its moments some of my most cherished child hood moments were doing crazy fun things with the bipolar people that were in my life. your situation is tough most men believe that they need to be the leader the strong one who makes thing work. your husband gets stuck when he is having difficulties with his bipolar because i am betting even he can see that he is no position to make the leader role work and takes it out on you. He should not do that i agree. But all of this is making me curious does he work? Is he physically abusive? Does he engage in risky behavior like cheating on you or go on wild spending sprees spending even money meant for necessity's IE food and rent. How bad is he really that is the question you will have to ask your self. If he is physically abusive or a danger to your family I am with you on leaving him. But if what you have described is as bad as it gets.then maybe you should wait until he even a little stable and lay down the law find out how much he wants you in his life and start making compromises. Some times you can work with some who has bipolar by giving in on a few things in just the right way. it sounds like he stuck he is stuck wanting to be the man he thinks he should be and when he cannot get there on his own boom he takes it out on you. You might be able to give a little to get a little but i would need to know more to give you any suggestions. By the way I am married to a bipolar person and my wife can be demanding at times to. I have learned/ learning the simple things i can do to give her back the respect of being some one who is independent and strong that helps more than any thing.
I am not a medical professional just some one with some folksy wisdom and let me finish by saying if you feel he is abusing you in any way even mentally and you do not think he will stop then you should protect your children and yourself and do what ever you need to do to be safe even if that means leave him. That is just my advice take it or leave it your choice.

Matt
 
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tryforever responded:
Sounds like you have already made your decision (" I am ready to move on with my life .")

This illness is not an easy one to conquer, and being surrounded by supportive people is the first step to wellness. You have to ask yourself: "Can I be the supportive and accepting person that my partner needs?" "Do I want to be here, right now and in the future?...no matter what happens"

Why prolong something negative when you know it's over? A good way to go about this if you have not already is to tell him that you are ready to move on with your life.

Along with unstable moods and unpredictability you also have to keep in mind that this is an illness, and these are the symptoms that are not always the easiest to understand and treat.

Treat him with some of that dignity and respect he speaks of and do him the favour of leaving him. After all, you have already made up your mind...there is no point in lying and dragging it out.

G


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