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    Feeling lonely
    dailymeditation posted:
    I have Bipolar with depression and have been on a downslide, again, for a couple weeks now. Back to sleeping, no desire to do anything, can't even take care of myself. If I do get up, I'm pretending to be normal not to upset my husband or daughter. My husband with COPD has been taking care of me, with difficulty because of his condition. He is also depressed, which makes my question here hard - I don't know what to do. I want to check myself in to the hospital again (this would be 6th in 2 years), just to regroup and also stop using my medication in the wrong amount. I'm making cocktails again. I don't want to die, my daughter, my husband, but when I get upset, frustrated, anxious my mind goes right back to pills. My psychiatrist and psychologist know my history and I see them Monday. I want to check in, but am scared as I hate putting my daughter/husband through this. HELP PLEASE, do others feel this way?
    bpcookie responded:
    Hello DailyM, Welcome to the board. The answer is yes, many ppl do feel as you do and have went through what you have. What meds are you taking for Bipolar? Also what meds are you abusing?

    Obviously the meds your on now are not working. Does your pdoc know that your depressed?

    Also, I think you should tell your husband how your feeling. Tell him that your thinking about going back into the hospital and ask him what he thinks about that. Also, give him all your meds, every single med. and have him give you your daily meds in the correct doses.

    Hope this helps, if only a small bit.
    If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
    spinnato responded:
    I know it's hard to make the decission to reach out for help, especially to the hospital. I've been to the hospital more than 6 times in 2 years. It's hard to make the choice to get help and I'm proud of you for making the choice.

    I've always told my husband about my need to go in advance, except when I was told to go directly there by the pdoc or tdoc. I would suggest talking to him. You never know, he might be feeling like you need some extra help too. As for my 3 kids, I tell them only that I need to go to the hospital because I'm sick (and that's really not a lie).

    In the meantime, I agree with cookie...give him all your meds and have him dish up the right amount. I almost lost my life once holding back one of my meds. I swallowed 20 klonipin because I couldn't sleep; 2 every 15 min for hours until I finally passed out.

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