Bipolar Disorder Community

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{DJ}}}}}}}}}}}} what's up that you are feeling so angry, overwhelmed, and down? I hope you feel better soon!

Weather - 36

Sleep - I forgot to go to bed - seriously, forgot to go to bed lol

Mood - pretty good, considering

Plans - will call neighbor first to see if she wants to have coffee before I go across the street for Job Club, then after Job Club will go to dentist office to work in the basement - its likely a mess - after thatn come home and try to get some cleaning doen here.

Have a great day
hugs
Debbie

Morning.....

Weather: Hot and sticky

Sleep: Restless

Mood: Bad

Plans: Walked 4 miles to pick up the bikes...rode the 4 miles back home. S just left to go get his mom. From that point on, who the heck knows? Let the nursing begin. UGGHHHH!

Good Morning

weather husband told me to turn on the air on at 6am because he said it was going to be 80 and he cant sleep in our hot bedroom during the day.....it is 50 now. He is nuts.

mood very edgy and anxious

plans see pdoc today. Lots to tell him. Tdoc I think is becoming afraid of me because of my hunting knife and my loss of time same thing about about my meds. She is worried someone is going to get hurt even though I never think about it.I am just her problem child.

Hello my dahlings Beepers

Weather: sunny and HOT

Sleep: good

Mood: ok

Plans: my daughter is coming over today and is bringing a few of her friends with her. I always love seeing my daughter.

Have a wonderful day my little dahlings. muahs

Dizzy Dahling, I hope your mood gets better. Enjoy spending time with your friends. Big hugs and muahs

Debbie Doodles Dahling, Your new pic. is absolutely beautiful. Girl, you need to stick Post-its all over your house reminding you to go to bed. Have a good day. muahs

Melly honey, Im so sorry that your playing the nurse maid. You must be ready to get your Dr.s license soon. hehehe. Take care honey. muahs

Momma honey, So tell me about this hunting knife. Why is your tdoc afraid of it? Do you carry it around with you? Im sorry, I havent been on the board much and I dont know whats going on with anyone. Big hugs honey

Hello and good afternoon,

Weather: hot, sunny and in the 80's

Sleep: better

Mood: irritable

Plans: phone calls, and grade papers and do powerpoint presentation for information

beej

Hey Beej Hun, Your weather sounds like our weather. Hope your mood improves. Have a nice evening. muahs

Good Evening —
Weather: Beautiful
Sleep: 3:30 am to 8:30 am — not good
Mood: Edgy and irritable; tears; had panic attack today had to do breathing exercises at my desk — this is the 3rd panic attack in 3 weeks — not good
Plans: Whatever
I'm disappointed in myself for being so indecisive about which medications I want to try. I'm on the highest dose for Celexa and I don't think it does a damn thing for me anymore. And, I am still indecisive about therapy. I am losing track of time and am disconnecting to the point where I disappear in my thoughts for hours at a time, forget where I am, and it isn't until someone comes into my office or my dh drives up at home that I snap out of it and I don't care where the day ends for me. I don't remember driving home tonight. My house is a mess. I'm disappearing and I try not to think the sooner the better.

Mercy, sounds like therapy is where you should be if losing so much time - dissociative disorders are not treated by medication, but by therapy with someone who knows and understands dissociation. Are you indecisive about therapy because you are not sure if you like the one you have, or do you not have one yet, and not sure if you need one?

I'm sorry things are so disconnected for you rigth now

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Mercy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Debbie

Thanks for the thoughts all of you. Just one of those days. I kept telling myself I would take it easy but I just get overwhelmed with everything I have to do. I get resentful because my dh does NOTHING to help me. The other day I was telling him about a health problem...he says nothing and hasn't asked me anything about it since then. Just things like that go on and on. I get overwhelmed and have negative feelings. My head started getting "noisy". I see my tdoc at the later in the week.
My visit with my friend helped. She is one of my friends from my old group of my now ex friends. She is the only one that keeps in touch with me. We will go months without talking...she called me last week and invitied herself over (which is fine). Its kind of an off friendship but I need her, even if it is just for coffee and chit chat. The thing is, she has lots of friend and doesn't need me. She is all I have and I take what I can get I guess.
K, sorry for rambling. ambien is kicking in. love my peeps

Mercy hun, you poor darling, Panic attacks are scarey. I hope your doing better today hun. Take care sweet heart. Im thinking of you. hugs

Thank you Cookie! Hugs back to you. Muahs
Hey, Is LOTRO like the lottery? or just a game?

Hi Debbie - POSS TRIGGER

The therapist cancelled our appt because she got sick. I've been too busy to call her since I got back from vacation. But I will because I am still having paranoia thoughts but don't have the mania with it - for now. I still have my doubts, suspicions, memories, people are lying to me about who they know but they're older now and they don't lie as well as they used to. Oh yea, the past has found its way into my present. So who can I trust to tell. Will I be followed to my appts? Am I being followed now? I'm living a very normal life and am concerned about the secrecy of it all.

Part of my indecision is I want a tdoc and a pdoc. If the Lexapro (generic avail at my local pharm now) does not straighten out my anxiety then I will switch from pcdoc to pdoc to look at other meds. Also, I've been reading about bp meds that protect the brain cells? as opposed to lamictal and lexapro that don't protect the brain cells but only stimulate the nerve endings? If my brain cells are not protected by the right bp meds will I experience dementia earlier or something? If so, I don't think my pcdoc is going to know about that so I will need a pdoc, but I want to try the lexapro now, but I don't have time to find a pdoc now, but maybe I should try something else now instead because I need to start protecting my brain cells now and shouldn't put it off any longer. No telling what I've done to my brain cells by not being on the right bp meds LOL Should I risk taking Lithium just because it may be a bp med that protects my brain cells? Or is it just not that important and I should just go ahead and make an appt with the tdoc for dissociation, ocd, ptsd, paranoia, etc. The antipsychotics are only to be used in the short term and I'm positive I will still have the same paranoid thoughts after I'd get off of them so what is out there for me that can help? A tdoc, a pdoc, EMDR (eraser therapy), I even have thoughts that if I talk to a tdoc she could disappear, or a pdoc may even turn me into the higher ups of mind control and the people who sacrafice their own children for wealth and power. This is why I need to protect my brain cells LOL When I start laughing and crying then I'm in trouble. Right now I am of the soundest mind!

Sorry to ramble on but I am indecisive and I don't feel comfortable talking about it to my pcdoc on Thursday. So I'm up in the air again. That tdoc doesn't have a clue as to the nut case she's going to inherit LOL

Thanks for listening.

Mercy

Yes Cookie it is a big hunting knife that I carry around in my purse. She asked to see it and I brought it out and she thought I was talking about like a swiss army knife, but it is the kind the army guys carry. It's blade is about 6 inches long with the serrated back of the blade. She sorta freaked. She asked me if I knew that I was carrying a concealed weapon and if the hospital knew I had it, the could have me arrested.