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    Just wanted to talk out loud (or type, that is :)
    monkeybee posted:
    I just wanted to say hello and to talk to someone who understands. I'm feeling much less melodramatic and less intensely emotional, at least for tonight . I'm still having trouble accepting and not obsessing over every little thing about my actions and thoughts.

    How did you come to terms with mental illness? Who did you talk to? How did you help your loved ones understand? Did/does anyone else obsess over the actual illness? How did you get over it and start thinking about other things again?

    And, just for fun, what do you like to do for fun?

    bpcookie responded:
    Hello Sarah hun, ya know, you seem like a happy and up beat person. I like that.

    Before I was diagnosed I actually thought I was going crazy. I was relieved when they said that I was Bipolar. I had no problem accepting my mental illness and I'm not embarrassed to tell ppl that I'm Bipolar. It took a while to get the meds. sorted out and to get my marbles in the right place.

    My husband has been a total blessing for me. He has stuck by me and all my craziness. I do and say some pretty nutty things at times but he is always patient with me and doesn't say anything negative. Also this community has gotten me through some rough times. I just love this place and all the ppl here.

    For fun I like to listen to music, watch movie, play LOTRO with my hubby and I do crafts to keep myself busy. Lately I've been making t-shirt purses. I can't always do the things that I want to do because I have health issues. Oh, and I love to go to parties, especially Halloween parties.

    Ok, I have blabbed enough. Tell us about yourself Sarah.
    You may go through life hearing a 1000 NO's but don't give up because your YES is out there waiting for you.- (Something my father told me.)
    monkeybee replied to bpcookie's response:
    Thanks cookie, that is too sweet. Thanks for sharing also.

    I was diagnosed at 15 and my high school years were hard because of bipolar. I had to drop out of school and be home schooled soph year and then change to a school that would accomodate me. I was outpatient and inpatient at different times for my illness. But then, I got better. After a year of being better, I decided I didn't need meds and wasn't bipolar. I excused away everything by thinking I could have snapped out of it. I tried to have a cookie cutter life and became a TOTAL control freak. I excused away all of my depressions and otherwise unstable behaviors as circumstancial. I did that until I had a break early this year and I haven't been stable since. Since I ran from this for so long and believed I was fine, accepting it has been hard. I have been off meds for almost 10 years.

    My husband is supportive but he jokes about everything, including this, so I can't talk to him about it much. Now that I told my best friend, she has been calling me to check on me. My mom is the only other person but she worries about me so much because of my history. I am already thankful for this community but a little embarassed by some of the things I've said out of emotions. Despite that, you guys have ebeen awesome.

    For fun, I like to write, read, and hang out with my girl friends. Oh, and drink brings me great joy . Now I have blabbed enough. but I loved hearing about you!
    lexismom11 replied to monkeybee's response:

    I went a long time without being diagnosed correctly. Now that I am diagnosed correctly, I can learn how to deal with the ups and downs of this illness. I had no idea what was really going on with me and had no clue why I was not getting any better even with the meds. The answer was I was not on the right meds.

    I can't say I have come to terms completely with my mental illness. For the most part I have, but I have times when I struggle with acceptance. Acceptance of mental illness partly comes from learning that you cannot change the fact that you have a mental illness, you can only learn how to manage it. I don't talk to many people outside of my therapist and doctor because it is hard for others to understand it when they have not experienced it. I'm not necessarily ashamed of it as much as it is just easier not to try to make people understand who do not really want to. One thing your loved ones can do is to go online and do a little research on the illness in question (such as bipolar). I have my times when I obsess over the illness and why I have it and all of that, but I try to focus on other more important things in my life like my daughter. Having the realization that you will not be able to change the fact that you have a mental illness will go a long way in helping to refocus your thoughts. Trying to find other things in your life that you can replace the obsessive thoughts with can help. Like cookie does crafts and I think there are others here as well that do crafts.
    bpcookie replied to monkeybee's response:
    Monkeybee, don't ever be embarrassed about anything you say. I'm like an open book and I say all sorts of things.
    You may go through life hearing a 1000 NO's but don't give up because your YES is out there waiting for you.- (Something my father told me.)
    bpcookie replied to lexismom11's response:
    Thats a great suggestion Lexismom. Having friends and family go on line and learn about Bipolar. Thats what my husband did.
    You may go through life hearing a 1000 NO's but don't give up because your YES is out there waiting for you.- (Something my father told me.)
    monkeybee replied to lexismom11's response:
    That is a great suggestion, thanks! I think I may invite him to one of my doc appts too so he can ask questions.
    monkeybee replied to bpcookie's response:
    Thanks !

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