when to put your foot down with manic behavior
Anon_54722 posted:
My spouse is bipolar2 is current on medicine does every thing wright but still has problems with manic symptoms due to the very well trained psychiatrist unable to find a medicine combination that will work without very bad sideffects. I have been very patient as of late on not clamping down on the purchasing of stuff we can not afford. but now a credit card has come in the mail that i found out about only by accident. I want so badly to cut it up and not let it be activated. But my spouse is not giving up and will do any thing to try to convince me to keep the card even trying to get me to let our couples councilor to decide.

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What should I do?
  • cut up the card and show i mean business.
  • let the couples councilor decide.
  • give in and keep the card just not let my spouse have it.
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mattthecat responded:
lotus responded:
Hi, I am also Bipolar 2. I was hypomanic for 4 months late last year. This only my 2nd episode in 12 years. It took that long to find the right medication combination and dosage. I felt terrible during this time. One of my symptoms, like your husband' was over spending. I am still finding unopen packages of things I bought. I had NO control over my spending. I would spend up to 6hours a day shopping. Looking for the best buys. Midway through the episode, I gave my credit cards and my 401 check book to a friend. It was the only way to help control my spending. Please tell your husband that sometimes we need outside help to control our manic syptoms. I wish you both the best in this decision.
melly2210 responded:
I'd be very firm about the credit card and spending issues. Whenever you say there are consequences, you must enforce them or else they mean nothing. Empty threats are just that. Empty. So cut that card up, go to the couple's counselor.

As for the mania, for some of us (like me) I exhibit mania almost daily even though I am on several medications to stabilize my mood. So long as I remain hypomanic or moderately manic, things aren't really bad. But severe mania happens occassionally. I've gone 9 days straight without sleeping. And without sleep, I do horrible, ridiculous things. Spending is sometimes one of them.

Your spouse needs projects. I try to stay as busy as I can. Scrapbooking. Filing. Dishes. Baking. And as of today, refinishing my grandmother's cabinet which I've been meaning to do for years. When I finish one, I find something else to do. And I try to avoid spending to do them, other than supplies.

Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops... at all. ~Emily Dickinson
Anon_54722 replied to melly2210's response:
It is me again. I am holding back until we see our couples counselor tomorrow. I cooled down quickly and came to see that our couples counselor needs to be in on this she has been working really hard to help us deal with the shopping issues and doing things behind my back. Things had been going well for us on the shopping thing until the Christmas season heated up and so many deals made it so tempting for my spouse. My spouse has plenty of things to do to keep busy. We are back to the drawing board on the shopping and will start with the couples counselor tomorrow. Which will lead to to the main counselor when he returns from a long trip out of town which is this week. the missed visits with the councilor may be part of this to.
Thanks every one for your well wishes and concerns.