Idk what to do, I met a man 2 years ago that I used to date in high school...long story short we quickly fell in love...I moved in...I knew he had a problem with addictions in the past, but thought they were under control...we are on our second breakup now...I always leave him...I can't take the chatting with other women, gambling, drinking, and occasional drug use...I love this man with all my heart and when things are good, we are awesome...he tells me he does not want to be with me right now, but will not let me move on, he calls constantly, texts, and sabatoges any possible relationship with guys that are just friends...he tells me constantly I'm his soulmate nd we will get back together...he has drained me physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially, after I gave it my all and loved him unconditionally!! I just found out that long ago he was diagnosed as bipolar, but refuses to take meds...it all makes sense to me now, the addictions, mood swings, the small things he does...My life has been constant drama, ive lost friends and family defending him..i confronted him and he agreed to seek help...I can't sit around and wait for him to get better, if I'm just a safety net...I mean I'd love to open his brain and know what he is thinking, am I really the girl he loves? He is 38 and has never had a long term relationship aside from me...i want so bad to know what he is thinking!! Is he staying away to really get help and just wasting my time? I can't keep living waiting helping for nothing...for him to get better and walk away...help
Hello Lostandconfused, first off let me say that I am sorry that your post didn't get replied to until now.
You sound desperate and I truly want to help. I think the best thing for you both is for you to break off ALL communication with him. Change your cell phone number or if possible, block all his calls and txts. Block him from any computer communications, email, face book, etc.
I understand how much you love him and want to be with him but you can't be happy with someone who is out of control. He most likely will not seek help if he still has you and he does still have you if he is still controlling your life (calling, txt, sabotaging your relationships). He needs to do this on his own. Then, if and when he is off of the drugs, taking medication for Bipolar (if that is indeed what he has) and is stable, you both can try dating again. But let me warn you, this is no over night thing. This will take him a very long time, maybe even years. Then again, he may never get the help he needs.
So, you may want to just get on with your life. Don't feel bad or selfish by doing this. You gave him time, it was his choice. Its time for you to be happy. Good luck to you.
You may go through life hearing a 1000 NO's but don't give up because your YES is out there waiting for you.- (Something my father told me.)
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