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    Will love conquer all?
    avatar
    Msgiva posted:
    About a month ago I met a man on an online dating site. We started phone conversations almost immediately. Those conversations could last for up to 3 hours per night. In this time I feel we know more about one another than I did in a 20 year marriage. I like him very much. Unfortunately we have not met in person. He was very upfront with me and told me he was bipolar. I realize, after living with an aunt and an ex boyfriend who were bipolar, that even though the intentions are good, even on meds, for some reason the disease makes it hard to follow through. I also know not to push things because they can retreat under pressure. So, I remain patient and know that there will be that good day when a meeting will happen. He had only been on lithium for. Two weeks when we met so maybe the drug is new to him. Excuses, excuses, I know. I feel I should give this a chance. That its worth it. I am not naive, and realize there will be good and bad days. I hope I can be so grateful for those good days that I can deal with he bad. What do you think?
    Reply
     
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    bpcookie responded:
    YES, love can conquer all. I met my husband on line and before we met I told him about my Bipolar. I wanted him to know EXACTLY what he was getting into. We have now been married over 13 yrs.

    Being with a Bipolar doesn't mean that you have to change who YOU are. I think it would be good if you talked to him about his Bipolar. Ask him how his mania is and how his depression is. That will give you a better idea of what to expect. Take care and I wish the both of you the best of luck.

    p.s. feel free to ask us any question or reach out for support. Thats what we are here for.
    You may go through life hearing a 1000 NO's but don't give up because your YES is out there waiting for you.- (Something my father told me.)
     
    avatar
    jselleck replied to bpcookie's response:
    Deffinetly!!! My husband and I met at the Indiana state fair where I was working for my aunt and uncle. I wasn't diagnosed yet, but we emmediately fell in love. We were engaged a year and a half later, and set to get married a year later. Then I got all manic and called off the wedding two months prior to it. I got invloved with a jerk who also was bipolar and did some horrible things. But he took me back. It's been 15 years this past august since the day that we met, and we've been married for 6 and half now. He's even the one who figured out that I was bipolar. Without his love and support I probably never would have gotten the help that I needed. So yes love can conquer all.

    JSelleck
     
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    skypper replied to jselleck's response:
    That is really awesome to hear J! Wow
    ~Sky~
    When nothing's going right, go left!
     
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    jselleck responded:
    Msgiva I grew up in a bipolar family my generation is lucky no bipolar so far. My wife is Jselleck so you know some of our history. But let me say I think things could really work for the two of you if he lets you in and sparks fly. By reading your post you seem to have three things down that will help you do good in a relationship with a bipolar person. The three things are understanding of Bipolar, experience with those who have bipolar, and the ability to be very patient. So if he does want to meet you I will be rooting for both of you.

    Matt
     
    avatar
    mattthecat replied to jselleck's response:
    OOPs I used my wife's amount to make this post sorry.
    Msgiva I grew up in a bipolar family my generation is lucky no bipolar so far. My wife is Jselleck so you know some of our history. But let me say I think things could really work for the two of you if he lets you in and sparks fly. By reading your post you seem to have three things down that will help you do good in a relationship with a bipolar person. The three things are understanding of Bipolar, experience with those who have bipolar, and the ability to be very patient. So if he does want to meet you I will be rooting for both of you.[br>[br>Matt
     
    avatar
    davedsel57 responded:
    Hello.

    Yes, I believe love can conquer all. My wonderful wife and I will be celebrating 25 years of wedded bliss this coming March 26. She knew I had a history of depression and came with some emotional baggage. So did she. I was not officially diagnosed as bipolar until after a 3 day stay in a local hospital psych ward when I was 41 years old.

    My wife tries to help by reminding me when I am manic to try and focus the energies better. When I am manic I talk alot and she gets quiet. That is my clue to try and control myself. When I am manic I spend money like water. We now have an agreement that neither of us spends money without discussing it first, and if I break that agreement she lets me know of her unhappiness. When I am manic I eat way too much of the wrong foods. She reminds me that I should be eating healthy for many reasons.

    Take the time to get to know this person and see how your relationship develops. Continue to try and be patient and understanding, and support him in any way you can. You may find that all this will be worth the effort.
    Please click on my user name or avatar picture to read my story.

    Blessings,

    -Dave
     
    avatar
    jselleck replied to davedsel57's response:
    Hey, wanted to recommend two books for you. Bipolar for Dummies and the Bipolar Survival Guide. Wish you luck. Take care.

    JSelleck


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