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Visit our Crisis Assistance Link for resources. For immediate help, get to the ER.

*No Dr Outside Contact Please*
I must be insane lol
ddnos posted:
I had to put that "lol" in the title so you would know I don't mean that literally (ok, kitty?)

The reason I say that I must be "insane" is because after not being able to get myself going to the volunteer training yesterday, I'm planning on doing something worse! lol Huh?

It dawned on me this afternoon that the job was posted last Friday and the manager of the position told me and that there would be instructions, etc., What dawned on me was that she was talking TO me, not just giving me info! lol She was telling me that because my former boss wants to hire me (if it works on both sides) that I'm "supposed" to apply for the position!

I found out today that they are doing this hiring process differently than normal in that they are going to be taking from the applicants and train them to do the job as volunteers and that way they can decide if they actually like the job and might be good at it and the employer can see them at work before hiring. Of course, I don't know how long the perspective people will be volunteering, but they will know going in that this will be the process.

Anyway, so I called my case worker and told her I think I need to apply officially for the job, but I need help with the resume, cover letter, etc. So we have an appt for next week monday morning at Starbucks to work on it. It must be mailed by the 5th of April (next friday)

So what ON EARTH am I doing? Of course, applying doesn't obligate me to the job, it just keeps my options open, and hopefully I will be able to get my act together by the time I have to try again re the volunteer training (probably next week!) YIKES! See? I must be insane!

I don't know if I"ll be able to do it, but I do know that I'll kick myself if I don't even put my name in the "hat," you know? I just remind myself that applying doesn't obligate me to anything, but it could open doors to something I may like and could be good for me!

Thanks for listening!
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
jselleck responded:
Debs, good luck in whatever you decide to do. I hope you can "get your act together" or whatever you decide to do. I know exactly what you're going through. I sooo need to get a part time job, but I keep putting it off and putting it off. Something always happens to keep me from putting in an application. Or at least that's what I keep telling myself. Matt wants me to work at Whataburger, this burger joint around the corner that's close enough I can walk to if necessary. I soooo do not want to work fast food again, but we need the money, know what I mean?? Well, I've rambled enough. Take care and good luck.

ddnos replied to jselleck's response:
Thanks, J! It's hard, eh? I think what also contributes to it being more difficult (for me, anyway) is that it's been over 2 years since I last worked. So the longer I'm away from working, the harder it gets because I've become accustomed to doing my own thing when, where, and why I want to. So going from that to HAVING to be somewhere takes re-disciplining myself, which is even harder when you throw in a bit of depression here and some anxiety there. lol

So we'll see. I'm going to try to not put too much pressure on myself, but at the same time, I know that I will have to push myself harder just to get there if it's meant to be!

I wish you the best as you pursue and/or figure out what you want to do. For both of us, I suppose that the worse that could happen is we get a job and then discover we weren't as ready as we thought, and so resign. At least we will have tried, eh? I just have to figure out if indeed I AM ready to go back to work part time, or not; but I have the feeling that I'm only going to know that if I actually get a part time job. lol That's not fair! lol I can't even think about this particular job because when I read the job description, I doubt myself and my ability to actually do it. I have butterflies in my tummy just typing about it. So I will just blindly mail in the application after my case worker helps me finish it all. lol Close my eyes, drop it in the mail box, and wait for the bomb to drop. lol

Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
bpcookie responded:
If your insane then I am too honey!!!
We will be friends until we are old and senile,.........then we will be new friends!!
ddnos replied to bpcookie's response:
I already knew that, cookie! lol
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
margaroo replied to ddnos's response:

I am so proud of you!

Can I join the insane group too?


Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
ddnos replied to margaroo's response:
Maggie, I thought you always were a part of that group! lol

Thank you re proud of me, but don't say that too early! I haven't got there yet!

Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown

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