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Wife & Family Looking for Advice ~ Husband un-diagnosed/untreated Bi-Polar Manic Episode
FourSpook posted:
My Husband of 2 years (relationship of 7 years total) has been diagnosed with ADD as a Child and diagnosed with PTSD from the Army.

About 4 weeks ago he told me he was going to work and then drove himself to the airport and moved from our home in Chicago to the beach in California. He appeared very manic when he left, he could not discuss anyone's feelings but his own and claimed to be writing a book/producing a movie, recalling bad memories from childhood and the war. I believe the "Sandy Hook Tragedy" was a trigger for him. He believes he was doing me a favor because he felt he was going to get violent and felt like he was not contributing financially or responsible enough to be a husband to me anymore because of his mental issues. He denies that he needs help and believes he is self medicating with medical marijuana, and having less responsibility. He has abandoned me leaving me with a lease and a path of destruction to his finances, job, relationships and appears to be completely isolated from friends back home.

Until recently he would call and text with myself and his parents on the phone and allowed us to visit him in California for 3 days. It now has been 7 days since I last heard from him and last I heard he told me his phone and wallet were stolen and he was asking me for money, which I did not give to him because this would have been the 3rd time I would have helped him and I have nothing to give and he is not responsible with money.

Myself and his parents do not know what to do and we are very worried about him and don't know if we are doing the right things by trying to connect with him but not supporting him financially. We want him to come home and want him to get help!!

Any tips you could give or if you know of any support groups for us. We considered going to an ALANON meeting to help us cope and understand, but we don't know if it is specific enough to his condition, we feel helpless!
mattthecat responded:
Welcome to the board fourspook.
Let me start by saying I am very sorry to hear what has happened to your husband. Getting your husband help at this point sounds like it would be very complicated and I have no useful advice to give you since I do not have any training in law. But I know of a group called Nami ( ) they are a grass root organisation that helps those with mental Illness and the family of those with mental Illness in a way that resembles ALONON most of NAMIs chapters have educational classes and group meetings for family and those with mental illness. So to sum it up there may be some people at NAMI that could give you and your in laws advice and support that will help all of you through this very trying time. I hope my response helps.


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