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I just want to help
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mommyluvsu posted:
Hi everyone... I am new to the community but I have a bipolar teen...I am trying to understand why am I always her focal point to release her anger....I can not allow her to disrespect me due to the fact that I am her mother and I also have other children....any advice please??????
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mattthecat responded:
Welcome to the board Mommyluvsu. It sounds like you have it rough. If your daughter has been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder then you now have a child with a serious Illness to take care of and you may have to go in to serious illness mode. No different then cancer, diabetes or some other serious treatable illness. Children who have a major illness do not always want to cooperate with complex treatment and will take out there frustration were ever it is easiest to do so and you are the easy target. There may be lots of help out there to be had if you need it. You may want to get on line or go to the library and do some research on all of your options. You may want to see if a group called NAMI http://www.nami.org has a chapter in your area. NAMI is Grass root organisation set up to inform and assist those who have mental illness and there family with the mental illness. I have never been in a family with a child who has a serious illness but I have known some people who had a child with serious illness those parents circled the wagons got the grand parent uncles, aunts and friends to help with there other children allowing mom and or dad to put extra attention on the sick child. Freeing up time to take the child to see any doctors, specialist and or councilors that would be needed.
Again sorry to see that you and your family are having a rough time. I wish I could give you more and better advice but i am just a supporter with no medical training my self. My wife has Bipolar disorder and she has lashed out at me when her bipolar is out of whack and she has troubles with the limitations bipolar can put on her. So i know what you are going through. So take my advice with a grain of salt.
I wish you luck and better times soon.

Matt
 
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monkeybee responded:
Hi mommyluvsu and welcome to the board. I was diagnosed with bd at 15 after being misdiagnosed with md at 14. I lashed out at my mom, my biggest support and biggest caretaker, and told terrible lies about her. She did NOTHING but care for me and love me with everything she had. She did everything she could to pull me out of what I was going through and she had to make many tough calls (ie: removing all privacy from my life) which I resented her for and pushed her farther away. I thought I hated her. I often disrespected both of my parents but it wasn't tolerated. There were always consequences. My mom just kept fighting (and it was hell for my whole family), kept enduring, kept reminding herself that I was not well and it wasn't just me. Eventually, I got better. And, although I carried much guilt over things I had said and done, my mom forgave me and now (I'm 29) she is my best friend and along with my husband, my biggest support still. Now, if I am not well, she knows it; she calls me on it; she helps me; I listen. I know it may not always work out like this, but please have hope. Do not stop fighting. Do not give up on your daughter or your relationship with her.

I wish you well!
Sarah


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