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    Wanna Scream, Break Things............Cant Stop Bawling
    bpcookie posted:
    Saw Pain Specialist who has been doing procedures in hopes to find me pain relief from my Vulva Lichen Simplex Chronicus , have pretty much given up on me. They are planning to do the same procedure that didn't work the other friggin 4 times, but this time instead of burning my nerves with radio frequencies, they want to burn my nerves with acid. In truth, they have no new plans. For over two years I have seen more specialists and Dr.s than I can count and have had procedures, treatments and been put on different medications and they have all failed. What is left? There is just no hope.

    I'm so angry and depressed. I can't stop crying. I don't know what to do. I just want to hide from the pain, disappointment, frustration..........everything.
    Please join my community called GRUMPY GROUPIES ( ) Fun and serious topics, nothing is taboo. So get on over there. Weirdo's are welcomed.
    jselleck responded:
    You poor thing Cookie. I'm soo sorry you're have troubles. Know how you're feeling Wish things were better for both of us. If you want someone to talk to, give me a jingle.

    monkeybee replied to jselleck's response:
    I'm so sorry you are always dealing with this and living with this pain. I wish they could do more for you! Thinking of and praying for you tonight. ((((hugs)))) Sarah
    melly2210 responded:
    Go ahead and cry. Punch a pillow. Go outside and throw lawn darts like regular darts and white coat clad scarecrows with pictures of your doctors' faces on them.

    You have every right to be angry and depressed. God only knows what all you've been through, and giving up is definately looking pretty easy right now. Don't. You're strong. Stronger than you think. Believe in you. I do. Love you!

    Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops... at all. ~Emily Dickinson
    DizzyJgirl responded:
    Oh sorry to hear how things are going with this. I agree with are stronger than you know. Don't let this set you back. I wouldn't give up on finding other treatment. It is kind of like our meds. It took me years to find the right med cocktail for me. I wanted to give up at times.
    Have you tried any kind of homeopathic treatment, dietary changes, etc?
    Don't give up. We are here to listen and help however we can. Hugs. xo
    Live Life Loud
    bpcookie responded:
    I swear, you guys have more faith in me than I have in myself. Once apon a time I used to laugh a lot, make others laugh, support and help others and now I have changed, everything about me has changed. I want to be that person again, I just dont know how to get back there. What do you do when your lost? How do I find myself?

    Every time I break down, I turn to this board and all you wonderful ppl, and you guys never give up on me. You are always here with such wonderful, kind hearts and you always reach out to help. You never fail me, even if things in your own life are a bit rocky. I want to express my thanks beyond just the two words "thank you" , but I totally suck at expressing myself. I love ya guys. muahs.
    Please join my community called GRUMPY GROUPIES ( ) Fun and serious topics, nothing is taboo. So get on over there. Weirdo's are welcomed.
    DizzyJgirl replied to bpcookie's response:
    You express yourself just fine! I wish I had some answers for you. I have been thinking of you. Sometimes we just need to let it out and vent to others. Everyone here is great about listening and not judging. What a treasure this board is.

    Finding myself...I think it is always a work in progress and it is baby steps. I often ask myself...what will make me feel good at the end of the day. I am also slowly learning to just let things go sometimes instead of letting it bother me and bottling it up.

    Maybe you need to look back at what made you happy and see if there is a way to bring that back into your life. Your artistic and creative side are what comes to mind but I also know when you are in pain it is hard to do that. Maybe some small thing.
    Live Life Loud
    bpcookie replied to DizzyJgirl's response:
    Ya know, what used to make me happy was helping ppl, making others laugh, doing crafts, listening to music, dancing, teasing my hubby and also, my dog made laugh and laughter makes me happy. I need to start being the person that I used to be. I need to start doing the things that used to make me happy, even if Im only doing a few of those things. I gotta start some where eh. muahs honey
    Please join my community called GRUMPY GROUPIES ( ) Fun and serious topics, nothing is taboo. So get on over there. Weirdo's are welcomed.

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