I haven't been on in a long time I am off all meds and have been for along while now and have been fine, There have been alot changes in my life and I find myself slipping so I called my old therapist and she is booked so she gave me recommendations and I called some of them and I made an appointment with one of them. However I don't believe nad and never really have believed that I am bipolar and then while i was in treament a few years ago I was diagnosised in addition with Borderlin Personality Disorder. The more I read that more it fits the it fits the more terrified I am the more I dread going to this new person the more I cry the more I want to cut the more I hate myself for being weak. I need real information on BPD or people who have it there experiences something, I am drowning her please help I swore I would never get sick again.
I am sorry that you feel the way you do. Whether or not you are BPD or not, it is nothing for you to "fear." In most cases, depending on the symptoms you exhibit, it is a pointer to starter point to help you get through this with your therapist. I am dx bp2, gad, ptsd and bpd. The thing is, I learned how to determine when the bpd started peeking out and how to combat it, much as I have the bp. Yes, both give me a really hard time, but I've learned how to handle them. My meds only slow me down in most cases which gives me time to recognize when things aren't right with me. Then I did out my tools and I use them to keep me on track. It isn't the end of the world. You can survive this.
Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops... at all. ~Emily Dickinson
(((Ducky))) I am sorry to hear you've been having a tough time hun. We can not prevent ourselves from never getting sick but it doesn't have to be so bad. I think that therapy is a big part in both bp and bpd and I'm happy to hear you reached out to your therapist and here as well. You are not weak, reaching out takes strength, don't let the negative thoughts in your head fool you, you are a strong and worthy and valuable person with a great big heart! If you feel like you can't stop yourself from sh please go to the nearest emergency room so they can help you with that, even if its just temporary medication or something to help you through until you can get to your appointment. (((((((((big big hugs)))))))))) it is going to be ok!
~Sky~ I had to fight like hell and fighting like hell has made me what I am.
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