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    Dr G. Manic delusion? *trigger*
    monkeybee posted:
    Hi Dr.G,

    I was dangerously manic. My doc prescribed Geodon. It worked to slow me down after a while. Currently, I don't know what is going on:I think my mood is mixed. My mind is still racing quite a bit and I still have energy, so I'm not depressed but at the same time, I am chalk full of anxiety and last night for instance, I was laying on the floor in tears, about to get up and cut. I am a mess and it is bizarre. Anyway, here is my question. Early this week, a pastor I know posted a story about Jesus' return being soon. The same day a facebook friend posted the same thing. I decided since they both posted on the same day, it was a sign, Jesus' return is immenent and I'm going to hell because I am no longer very religious. I didn't let go of this, it has been ruminating in my mind since. Now, in the past, I have been extremely hyper-religious in a manic episode, believing I could cast out demons, believing spiritual people could read my mind, having hallucinations about the Holy Spirit and Jesus. For this reason, I am trying to be cautious about this matter. Do you think the thought that Jesus is returning and I'm going to hell is a delusion? If so, how do I combat this? Also, just fyi, I do see my pdoc soon; I'm just worried as usual.

    Joseph F Goldberg, MD responded:
    Dear Sarah, It's certainly possible you're describing a delusion. It's worth having evaluated by your doctor. When Geodon is dosed above 120 mg/day it has antipsychotic properties. In the registration trials of Geodon for mania or mixed episodes the average dose was about 140 mg/day and sometimes up to 160 mg/day. Dr G
    monkeybee replied to Joseph F Goldberg, MD's response:
    Thank you, I am a christian but not typically very religious. I just can't let go of this or the condemnation that goes with it. I feel sick about it and keep thinking how the BibIe says He'll come like a thief in the night. I try to be cautious of anything that could be religiously over the top because of my history. I'll let you know what my doc says. I appreciate your response; I was kind of hoping otherwise, but at least I can try to be prepared if I am losing touch.
    reneegigliotti responded:
    What I hate about being told my belief that I have super human powers are in fact "delusions" is that I never believe I'm being told the truth. I always think it's a conspiracy to keep my powers from making a huge impact on the world. Even when I am no longer manic, it is really hard to see my psychiatrist's point of view that my G-d given powers were simply biochemical abnormalities. This last admission, I was certain I had the power through thought waves to influence the minds of Hamas and Hezbollah terrorists. I knew that if I could just get to Israel, join the IDF, and perform secret missions into Gaza, I single handedly could stop all terrorism telepathically. I read every Israeli newspaper I could get a subscription to. I was up for weeks reading obscure Hebrew language papers looking for hidden clues, of which I found many. News broadcasts were directed just at me and they contained subliminal messages directed at me alone. I ended up buying a plane ticket to Tel Aviv. When I told my psychiatrist my plans, he very calmly told me we had come to a place where an admission was needed. I was extremely combative and he was very firm. I told him that if he didn't let me go people would die needlessly. He said either I admit myself voluntarily or he does it without my consent. I was so distraught and agitated in the hospital over people dead from terrorist attacks. I knew I could have saved them and my psychiatrist wouldn't let me. Then I was furious at him. Then I was not allowed to watch television or read newspapers at all until he OKed it. It was a long admission. I can sort of see now,4 months later, that maybe he might have been correct. However, I still cannot look at any terrorist attack news report and not wonder on some level if I could have prevented it. My psychiatrist says as long as I can see the argument against the "delusion" we are doing fine.

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