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My Last Day
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ddnos posted:
Today was my last day with my new therapist. I had a session with her, during which time she said that upon consulting with other therapists and thinking about it, she felt that we weren't a good fit because of how she does therapy. She said she didn't believe that she could help me because of that and didn't want to continue that way for my sake. She said that it had nothing to do with me personally, that she likes me and thinks that I'm a lovely person (her words!) - so, she said, it was a hard decision for her too; but felt that it was in my best interest.

I agree with her, as some of you know I was coming to the same conclusion, but it's still sad. I cried and the Joanne part of me got angry and showed that anger a couple times. Other parts of me expressed their concern as well; but all in all, it was Ok.

I don't know what I'm going to do about finding another therapist or if I'm even going to. Maybe I will try to go without one for a while and see how that goes. She did give me a few names to try; so we'll see.

Even though I was pretty certain this was going to happen, I didn't think that she would be the one terminating (which somehow makes it harder) and I didn't think it was going to happen today. So I feel like I'm sort of in a daze right now.

I emailed my former tdoc to let her know - I wish I could go back to her.

Anyway, I'm feeding my face with gluten filled food that I'm not supposed to eat - emotional eating. Sigh

Debbie
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
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reneegigliotti responded:
Hugs Debbie,


Forgive me for this but...she didn't even give a referral to a more appropriate therapist? WOW. I'm sorry but she should NEVER have left you alone with your stuff undealt with. If she's not competent to meet your needs she's OBLIGATED to find someone who is. That says so much about her that she didn't do even that basic professional task. Can I be angry for you? Sophie is turning red too!
 
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ddnos replied to reneegigliotti's response:
Hi Renee, well, she did give me 2 names and 1 place; but when i saw the first name, i told her i had already seen her once on a free consult and we weren't a good fit due to her style - she said she didn't think it would be a good fit. The other person she gave I just looked up and my ex new therapist said she does therapy the way that im used to and works for me; but who knows. Im not interested in contacting anyone right now cus im just tired. When/if Im ready to , I will. The other place she listed i looked up and it would not be appropriate for me. ex new t said she wasn't sure about them anyway.

I/we asked if today was last day and she said yes, and someone inside told her she said she wouldn't do that cus i had asked her 2 sessoins ago that if she ever knew she was going ot leave for any reason, to make sure she give us plenty of notice. She said of course she would. So whoever inside called her on that and told her she said she wouldn't just leave. But this is different situation. I was talking about if she was my therapist and some day down th eroad, she decided she was going to move or something, that she would give me at least 3 month notice if possible, preferrably, 6 monts. She agreed. But this is different re that. but yes, is ok for you to be angry on my behalf. i dont feel angry, i just feel sad and tired and numb and i eating box of lil debbie cinmon rolls lol they was callen my name! lol I got reply from my former tdoc and she said she was sorry and did ex new give me any ideas and that we could talk about it my next check in time in couple weeks. She is stay with me itll i get established with new tdoc.

Ok, lil debbie callen my name lol
Debbie
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
 
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reneegigliotti replied to ddnos's response:
I'm shaking my head. I'm so sorry. Sophie is red and hopping mad! Take good care of your little ones, and YOU. Keep me informed on how you are doing.
 
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ddnos replied to reneegigliotti's response:
im ok i suppose, thanks. yu feeling better than was earlier today?
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
 
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reneegigliotti replied to ddnos's response:
My psychologist and I are sorting out the difference between a trauma reaction and a bipolar depression. They look a lot alike in me. We are learning to sort out the difference.
 
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slik_kitty responded:
so sorry dd. even though you were thinking of ending it, having her do it hurts. i don't think it is right for a therapist to be able to pick and choose who they want to help. if her style isn't right for you then she should adjust to help you, not just send you away. does she realize what damage that does?

hugs
 
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ddnos replied to slik_kitty's response:
Thank you Kitty, but in her defense, it wasn't just a matter of style that she could adjust, but that of training. We talked about this. She's not trained in the kind of therapy method (not style) that I need. So it was indeed not a good fit and not something she or I could just adjust to. I agree that having her be the one to end it hurts more than me ending it, but they both would have the same results, you know?

So I'm not really sure that this could have been done any other way given the whole dynamics of it. Maybe she could have done it a little bit differently, I don't know, but under the circumstances, I think she was probably right. Giving me notice really wouldn't have done any good in this case because of the reason. So though it came as a surprise, I was going to do the same thing; so we were both actually on the same page for the same reason. The only difference is that she took the step a "few minutes" before I did.

Debbie
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown
 
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monkeybee replied to ddnos's response:
I'm sorry Debbie; I know that hurt! I hope you will give therapy another shot when you are ready and that you will find someone who you both trust and can help you.
 
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ddnos replied to monkeybee's response:
Thank you, Monkeybee!
Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different --Unknown


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