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Two-faced people (triggers)
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GiGi122906 posted:
Hey everybody what's shakin'?

My vent post today is two-faced people. Yes, it does seem that I always have something going on, doesn't it? The truth is I know a lot of jerks.

So nearly 6 months ago my boyfriend and I purchased a quad (atv, 4-wheeler, ya know). A "friend" of my mother's helped us out by putting the entire purchase, which was close to 4 grand, on her credit card, and we were and are to pay her monthly payments. Which we do. Well, this past week (due to my stinking forgetful nature) it completely slipped my mind that it was due on the 15th. This woman knows that I can be forgetful at times and I specifically told her to remind me a few days in advance before each payment is due so that the bf and I can pay her. If you guys honestly think that I remembered to write down that the stupid thing is due on the 15th of every month, you're wrong. But believe me, it's being done now. Anywhoo..so I forget to go up there last weekend. She doesn't remind me. She called me on Friday and said that it was due, so I asked her if I could bring up the money for her today (as in Monday) and she said yeah, but then proceeds to let me know that there's a $39 late charge on top of the payment. Well, ya know, whatever. I mean, I should have remembered to write down that it was due but I didn't, and I'll remember in the future.

Last night my boyfriend and I go to his house and we went upstairs to visit his mom because I haven't seen her in a while. The two-facer, apparently, had the audacity to call my boyfriend's MOTHER and inform her that we didn't pay the quad yet and to put a For Sale sign on it. The only stinking reason I even asked for her help to begin with is because I didn't have enough credit to get it on my own since my car is in my dad's name, I don't own a home and I live with my parents, etc etc. Yeah, I'm babied. Can you tell? Needless to say, this triggered me something fierce. She already knew that we were stopping by her house today after I got home from work, and yet calls his mom of all people and starts yelling at her about it?! So I went outside and jumped on my cell phone and reamed her a new azz. I told her that I wish I never asked for her help, I'll take out a loan and pay her off so I don't need to hear her big mouth anymore, I told her to lose my cell phone number, etc. I totally went off. I actually felt my eyes twitching and I felt the rage surging, that's how damn angry she got me. I told her that she's nothing but a two-facer, that all she does is cry about how broke she is and I'm sick and tired of dealing with it. Then she proceeds to tell me that she has an almost $1000 mortgage payment, AFTER she told me a few months ago that her and her husband bought the house outright in 1981 and all she has to do is pay property taxes, she owes nothing on the house. So not only is she two-faced, but a liar to boot, who doesn't even remember what she tells people. Certain people are triggers and she's a big one to me. Can anyone see why?!

Thanks for letting me vent. I am sooo sick and tired of people thinking they can have the upper hand and make me feel like I'm lower than the bottom of the ocean. It makes me sick to my stomach and triggers my irritability. Despite my friend coming home this week I'm not in a good mood at all, and now I have to worry about the bpbf going off and telling me that we should get rid of the quad because we won't have to deal with her and then HE'LL be an irritable jerk to me about it. And yesterday was such a good day before she started her bs. Grr I hate people. I could understand her concern if she wasn't paid in the past but I've always been on time, this is ONE screw-up that she had part in anyway. Oh well, whatever. Have a good day everyone. I'll try to. Now I'm starting to feel guilty that I even talked to her that way, I'm SURE she called my mom and went off about what a jerk I am for a good hour straight. Whatever.
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bpcookie responded:
Gigi, your so much like me. I always say *whats shaken* and *peace out*. Wow, we are just so cool. Do you have a calender? I write everything on my calender because Im so forgetful. Yea, I think its a good idea to try to get your own loan to pay her off. That way you dont get hassled. I had the opposite prob. with my ex husband. When I left him, I let him stay in the mobile home, but it was under my name. He was always late on the payment, the bank would call me and I would have to get on his case. When he moved into his house I told him to take out a second mortgage and add the mobile home to it. It worked, no more bother. Im relieved, he is relieved, no more calls from the bank, he has no more calls from me. Both parties are now happy about it. Good luck honey.

muah

Cookie
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
Thanks Cookie. Haha yeah we are alike in a lot of ways. I do have a calendar, but where should I write a note to myself to remind myself to write something on the calendar?! Yes, that's how bad I am. And I can definitely understand that you would be calling your x regarding his late payments on a mobile home in your name. I'm never late on this stupid quad payment, except for this month, which was a stupid fluke because she didn't tell me and my forgetful-Jones azz forgot. Idk, I still feel guilty too, like I'm a jerk for going off on her. And I mean I totally went off lol. It felt good for about 5 mins. afterwards until the rush of adrenaline wore off and my rage subsided a little bit.
 
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bpcookie responded:
Gigi, I understand the guilt thing. When I first divorced my x, I would say terrible things to him and then feel really bad about it. But he would say hurtful things to me and he really didnt care how much it hurt. I guess we have deeper feeling than some ppl do.

Cookie
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
It depends, sometimes I think my boyfriend's heart was carved out of stone and other times it's bigger than the universe. It all depends on the moods.
 
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bpcookie responded:
I am a truely luck person. My husband is very understanding, hardly ever hurts my feelings. He is so handsome, has that great accent, so smart and a level head, that Im always afraid other women will want him. Just today while I was on the phone with him some girl came up and gave him a note. A NOTE???? what? but he explained that she was from HR and it was about his disability. Of course I questioned him, asking if she gave anyone else this note, and the answer was no. Then I asked why couldnt she just call him, if she was cute or pretty. I know this girl, she is pretty. But he told me NO she wasnt cute or pretty, so I tell him "good answer!!"
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
LOL how cute. I can't complain about my honey, he just called me and I told him about that jerk that calls himself a boss, who by the way was suspended for 3 weeks last year for sending porn emails, and he told me to get the heck out of his department before he comes down here and smashes him and to calm down because I'm one of the best they have here. Not to mention he slow-danced with me last night to "Babe" by Styx. I love him so much. At least he's coming to pick me up from work at 4, so that's one bright spot in this already-horrible day.
 
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hereinmyhead responded:
I don't think you should feel like a jerk at all for what you said...but that's because if I know ANYTHING about my own self, it's this - if somebody sets me off over something so ridiculous, NOT saying something back would be impossible. Utterly impossible. If I read your post right, you were what, a WEEK late? Good grief! She probably felt OOOHH-SOOOOO Superior after tattling on you to your bf's mom, why shouldn't you let her have it? The whole transaction itself was between the 2 of you and HER. That's it. She had no right to air your private financial business to anyone or humiliate and berate you like that. (not to mention, if you want to get technical, that it's entirely illegal for a creditor, which she chose to become by doing this, to discuss details like she did with another party). I'm sure I would have said much worse, probably trying my hardest to make HER feel like the azzhole. Then I'd probably punctuate it all with something sarcastic, like telling her to get off the cross. Just getting angry and stewing would eat me ALIVE! I couldn't do it. I feel like "why should I hold my tongue when I wasn't the one to start spewing the BS in the first place?"!!! I am not normally one to start crap, but when somebody else's "spit-stirring" involves me, I don't let it slide if I'm really upset or offended by it. I'm even worse if I'm around when somebody tries bullying or picking on someone who they see as weaker. Hold me back! (lol) susie
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
Hahaha you are exactly like me, Susie. Thanks for supporting me. Yeah, I wonder if I should tell her that it's illegal to discuss this information with anyone else. And you're darn right she humiliated me, my boyfriend's mother is someone whom I have the utmost respect for and love like she's my own mom. And this woman made her extremely upset by calling and telling her this information. Sometimes I think that those of us who are bipolar are the "normal" ones..whatever that means.
 
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hereinmyhead responded:
It's kind of a toss-up, whether or not I'd mention the specific laws regarding debt collection... On one hand, if she isn't aware already, that's just tough, because it's her responsibility to know or find out for herself, but it's almost too irresistable not to at least "recommend" that she familiarize herself with the "Fair Debt Collections" act, but then so is the idea of letting her go on acting the fool until she really crosses a line, one that bites her in the azz big time in small claims court. I hate people who just *assume* they have the upper hand and regard you as mere "meat with eyes", that they can treat anyway they choose, for as long as they believe they have something to hold over your head. GRRRR!
 
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hereinmyhead responded:
Now there's a perfect example of what I mean when I say our emotional extremes can cause us to consider and appreciate things that "normal" people don't even consider. You've had a rotten day, with plenty going on to be bugged and irritable about (and not one iota of it has to do with the last "Idol" contestant to get waxed, or not being granted enough airtime on today's episode of the "ME" show), but a truly small gesture, like a ride home with your bf, can sometimes just wipe the other junk out of the way for awhile and give you a bit of joy. The "junk" will come back in some form or another, but I think it sometimes helps us become more aware of the power and significance of the good things, even tiny ones.
 
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bpcookie responded:
wait just a cotton picking minute Gigi, your b/f danced with me to that song the night before. LOL, then come to find out your b/f danced with my husband to that song the night before that. ppppffftttttt
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
Yeah tell me about it. I kept to my word and stopped at her house after work yesterday, as I specifically told her I was going to do, and her only words were "thank you." I didn't answer and just walked out. She always thinks she has the upper hand, and then when I tell her where to stuff it she says "after all I do for you, you talk to me this way" and starts her crying jag. I'm at a loss as to what to do, I think it's best if I take out a loan and thank her for her time, hand her the money and tell her to shove it where the sun doesn't shine.
 
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GiGi122906 responded:
Well they're both British, Cookie, what did you expect?! LMAO! The only difference is my Polish/British mutt doesn't have the accent.


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