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Do you have Borderline Personality Disorder? This new Exchange has been developed so we can encourage each other, share tips to get through those down days, and/or just vent.
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bod27 posted:
hey there

by logging on at work I came across this exchange. I normally post on the self harm one (which is a perm fav on my computer at home) but now that I have found this one I will pop between the two.

Was given a BPD diagnosis last year. currently undergoing a year long course of DBT.

hope to get to know you guys at some point.

Bod
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lovelylemontree310 responded:
  • waves hello* Hi, Bod.
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    marysings responded:
    Welcome! I created this website because I had finished all the sexual abuse issues I had worked through.

    DBT! Ah, yes, hard to learn and even harder to use but the skills are effective.

    I've been learning the skills since Jan 2004. They really aren't that bad to learn or use. I just have trouble using them at times when I need to use them.

    I'm looking forward to getting to know you better, too.
     
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    bod27 replied to marysings's response:
    cheers guys

    looking forward to getting to know you better too MarySings and Hi LLT

    Had a knock back today and managed to use my skills so thats a thumbs up for today but yeah you are right they are hard to use but am certainly finding learning about them all very insightful. They make so much sense!!

    Glad this board is here - will check in when I can - thanks for getting it started
     
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    bod27 replied to marysings's response:
    wasn't going to post this and am still not sure if I will but here goes.......

    sometimes I am pleased to have a diagnosis - at least I have something I can deal with now - but on the other hand I am not sure if I like it. It's so difficult to explain to people how my emotions work and why my reactions to things can be so screwy. It makes me feel even more alone and empty.

    Recently a very good mate of mine said she understood my frustration finally (she has a chronic unknown thing wrong with her)but she only understands it partially and I think she was talking more about the depression rather than bpd.

    I am so tired of being all fine and capable on the outside but such a mess inside. I am sure people don't understand why I haven't made a go of my career.

    I was told once that I can get rid of the diagnosis by doing the dbt skills and so wouldn't have to be labled for the rest of my life but I really don't see how that can work.

    Hope you are well today

    Bod
     
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    marysings replied to bod27's response:
    I don't know that we ever will be 'over' being Borderline. There are a few people that claim they are 'cured' but I can't see that for myself.

    Can you tell me how to be fine and capable on the outside? I tend to be 'open' and always on guard. It's tiring.

    I must sign off for now. Do you live in the states? If so, have a nice holiday weekend.

    Mary
     
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    MyDeli replied to bod27's response:
    I just wanted to say hello. Hope you have enjoyed your weekend.

    I wonder if the symptoms of BPD ever really go away or if we just learn to manage them better?
     
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    MsHyde1128 replied to bod27's response:
    Hi Bod,
    I uderstand how u feel about your outside vision to people but the inside is a mess. When I go to work ( I have 2 jobs), Everyone loves me, they apperciate me and I'm really good at what I do, it feels great. But I think to myself... If they only knew how I acted lastnight or yesterday etc! Its like there's a monster who lives inside me and it just pops out every now and then.
     
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    tinnlizz responded:
    Hi i just got on today.I would like to talk to people i can relate to me.Im bipolar, bpd,Im in need of friends not jackass people like i no who only care about themselfs you no
     
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    tinnlizz replied to bod27's response:
    mary, i understand i feel alone to.Im scarred to live @ affraid to die.Sleep is my only comfort.I cant keep a boyfriend they all tell me im to much to deal with.thank god for my cat ha ha.Im bpd,bipolar,pts.Its no picnic ive spent 6 months in bed at one point.
     
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    emiltim responded:
    Hi.
    I am new on this board. I have BPD, bipolar, anxiety, fibro, arthritis, etc.... I'm pretty much a 'hot mess' lol!

    I am 42, single mom with 2 pre-teen kids. As I age (mature), and through counseling, I can see some of the things that I do and say that aren't normal. I simply tell people "I'm missing a filter, so take what you get" and smile at them!

    I am trying desperately to raise my children in a different (safer) environment than I was raised in. They deserve better! I am raising them with a strong faith, and that was something that was lacking in my own childhood. Hopefully they can see how people are 'supposed to be' compared to how the majority really are.

    I'm not sure if I am making sense at this point, so I will log off for now. Would love to chat more.......
    -Julie
     
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    yukaliptus replied to bod27's response:
    I was diagnosed with bpd in 05' I have mostly been running away from the diagnosis looking at the words borderline personality disorder confusingly just as confusing as my emotions and reactions to people. I dont trust anyone and not having anyone who can relate makes me feel like i am alone in the wilderness. i seem like i am doing great on the outside and it attracts people who want to suck up my postivity but on the inside i hate myself for no real reason. its feel good to know that i am not in a world by my self with this
     
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    yukaliptus replied to emiltim's response:
    am new to this board and you are making perfect sense i too am missing a filter i cant hide how i feel. which makes me passionate sensitive and intense.
     
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    Llsibb replied to MsHyde1128's response:
    Hey how are you guys??? I'm new to this site. And Im just in the process of recovering from yet another failed attempt to stop it all. Been trying to make sense of what's wrong with me. And I spent the last 12 hours reading all the stuff on here. And I now feel like Im not alone and maybe there's still hope. I know that u can understand how I feel. Please if possible to help me out here. What should I expect to happen? Will it ever change??? Who should I talk to?? Who should I see?? I'm having major trust issues. Any advice on how to pick a specialist and how to be able to trust one enough that I can cry my heart out and get all the secrets out once and for all?? Please please. Thank you soooo sooo much
    A snake with gold wings to fly is what I always dream of
     
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    mandybutterflykiss replied to lovelylemontree310's response:
    Hi Bod!


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