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Do you have Borderline Personality Disorder? This new Exchange has been developed so we can encourage each other, share tips to get through those down days, and/or just vent.
spa1992 posted:
I have known for a long time something was not quite right with me. I got help late in life, saw 20 different doctors, 25 different diagnosis (sarcasm) and I've been on more medication than an elderly hospice patient. My family doctor sent me to a specialist for testing. In all this mess, no one ever had me tested for any problems. Just shoved pills down my throat.

I feel like I sit in the backseat of my mind. Like the two people in the front fight for the driver's seat. I'm severely depressed 99% of the time. The 1% percent of happiness is rare and often leaves me in a lot of pain afterwards. Then I bounce from a soft introvert, most of the time, to a violent aggressive monster that will do God knows what when pushed. I have severe codependency issues. I've been rejected all my life by everyone. Especially women, the cruel things they have done to me did not help either. I'm never good enough, for anyone.

I could go on and on about this. I go back for my test results in a couple of weeks. I just want to know if I am alone in feeling like this?
rebekkah99 responded:
I'm new to this page. I saw your discussion, and I can so relate to all you are saying. Especially the part about bouncing from an introvert mostly to a violent aggressive monster. People make me crazy. Many are unkind. I avoid then, but that gets me into trouble. I watch too much TV. When I try to be around people like my Psychologist tells me to, I feel so angry at them for the things they say and do to me that I say hurtful things to them. I've been abandoned all my life. By my family, by my husband, by my siblings. Friends say I'm nice, but they don't call. Someone comes to visit me, but I never hear her knock. I never knew she was here. I had to quit one of my meds because I can't get it for free anymore. It costs $1000/monthly. I'm not doing well. Can't sleep. Eating too much, and I'm trying to lose weight. I've lost 211# so far. I only have a few more to go. You are not alone, and you deserve to not be abondoned.

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