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    Do you have Borderline Personality Disorder? This new Exchange has been developed so we can encourage each other, share tips to get through those down days, and/or just vent.
    Chancy71 posted:
    Hello. I'm new here but I could use some advice please. I'm having trouble with depersonalization / dissociation. I go in & out of reality and don't always feel that I can control the switches. Is that part of BPD? I used to be in treatment (and overtreated...) but I moved and am not in anything regular at this point. The problem with possibly looking for a new therapist is that I always push them away & sometimes get worse when I'm seeing them. I'm rather confused if I should try to see one again and, if so, how to go about finding a good one who will accept me as a patient. (Long history of mental illness as a youngster, plus not everyone will accept a cutter.)

    The difficulty is that this dissociation thing keeps getting a hold of me and I can't stay in reality long enough to solve my situation.

    I'm sorry---I imagine this got rather confusing. If you've any suggestions, I'd sure appreciate them.

    I thank you,

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    marysings responded:
    Hi Chancy. Welcome to the BPD community.

    I have a few problems with dissociation but not to the extent you are having. If I were you, I would search for a therapist who can help you. (and about the cutting...the idea of therapy is to stop cutting and learn DBT skills to stop the cutting)

    I wish you the best of luck.

    When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another. Helen Keller
    AveMaria02 replied to marysings's response:
    So far I have seen 2. I am seeing my 2nd therapist now. I was diagnosed during the Winter of 2004-2005.
    emiltim responded:
    I have seen numerous therapists over the years. Some got "too close" to figuring me out, so I dumped them. Others had no clue, and just listened to me talk for years.
    The one I am seeing now is incredible. I am in my 40s now, and am understanding that I actually do have a problem. She is the first one I have admitted my 'self injury' to (I have always hidden my cutting). I am much more careful now that I have kids counting on me.

    Chancy, it really is worth it to find a good therapist who CARES, and stay with them. It can take awhile to find the right one, and that part sucks. But it really helps to have someone to ask " is what i'm feeling reality, or is it the bpd?"

    I hope this makes sense....
    Chancy71 replied to emiltim's response:
    Thank you all for your responses and encouragement.

    Emiltim, you make a lot of sense. I am working towards trying just 1 more. It's a lot of work to get one that accepts insurance & can be affordalble, etc.......I think I found a possibility. I guess it's worth a shot at least.

    emiltim replied to Chancy71's response:
    Good luck Chancy.

    I am lucky to have good insurance. I only pay a $20 co-pay. I really hope that you find someone that helps!

    Please keep us updated.
    Chancy71 replied to emiltim's response:
    Well, I just had my 1st appointment with a new therapist last night... It went okay, but it brought up a lot of old memories just being in that type of setting again. I didn't self-injure though, so I guess that's a good thing.

    She taught me about EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and, in trying it afterwards, I did feel a difference. I suppose I'll go week by week and see what happens.

    Thanks for your support.
    marysings responded:
    I just reread your post and I have a question....

    What do you mean by "over-treated"?
    When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another. Helen Keller
    Chancy71 replied to marysings's response:
    Over medicated & ECT (shock therapy) by age 20. Looking back now from a healthier standpoint, it went a little over the top....

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