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    Life after breast cancer
    An_248350 posted:
    I was diagonised with breast cancer seven years ago, I had my right breast removed . i had cheamotherapy and radiotherapy,And a year and a half later i had a reconstruction and an uplift in my left breast.Everything was going fine I was very happy to be over that stage in my life, During all my treatment my husband was very supportive, but unfortunitly for me I pushed him away as I did not like my body, Even today 7 years on i am emotional about how I look ,this has being a very hard road for my family andI.I have lost labido, any desire for sex which has had a terrible effect on my marriage . I would love to hear from anyone in the same circumstances as i am in xx
    judyfams responded:
    I have not had the same problem you are having. Hopefully other women here will post with some ideas to help you.
    My advice would be to talk to your oncologist or call your hospital to find the name of a counselor who specializes in treating women who have had breast cancer.
    Many hosptals do have such specialized therapists/counselors which I think is what you need. You sound like you are dealing with self esteem issues, and depression and that is taking a toll on you emotionally and on your marriage.
    I would suggest that you find a counselor who can help you sort out your feelings.
    Good luck,
    rachael67 responded:
    Oh, Kiddo! Cancer has a tendency to be as destructive mentally and emotionally as it does physically! Seems even tho' you are doing well with the physical aspect, the emotional has done quite a number on you and continues to do so.

    Not only are you battling the way you see yourself, but you are dealing with tons of guilt in how you are treating those who love you and try to help! Tell me in that scenario where you have given yourself permission to mourn what you have lost, reconcile with how your life and future have been impacted and changed, and forgiveness for appearing to dismiss the help of others? You insist on not letting yourself off the hook for any of it!!

    We have all visited most of the areas you speak of, but generally, we have been kinder to ourselves and not lingered quite so long. It seems as if you not only are in a bad a place, but have been there so long that the depression has only grown deeper. You, my Friend, need a helping hand out of that pit! PLEASE!!!! It is time to seek some help!! Have you discussed any of this with your medical team?

    I would think you might need to have a good work-up to check things like your thyroid, etc. Also, finding some emotional support through a counselor and support group might relieve some of the pressure...And you might even discover that much of what you are experiencing is quite normal! They can ease you thru ways to deal with such manifest guilt and image problems.

    Also, it is for times like this that anti-anxiety/depressants were created! Take advantage of their help. It need not be a permanent situation but might be just the slight support you need at this time!

    Lastly, I am glad you have found this group!! We are here for one another, open 24/7 and non-judgmental! Most of us are more than familiar with all the aspects of the "new normal" post bc...So, come and ask questions, get support, vent, and laugh with us! We're here for one another!!

    Let us know how you are doing. Okay?

    Just when the caterpillar thought her world was over, she became a butterfly! Don't give up five minutes before the miracle!!

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