Karen, these are difficult days...Waiting is one of the biggest challenges we face on this journey! And should you find a way to make it pass more quickly and less stressfully, for heaven's sake, bottle it and you'll make a mint!!!
Janie has given you some very good suggestions. Another two I would add:
BREATHE! Yes, sounds kinda silly but we tend to freeze when we are scared and hold our breath as if that alone will make it all go away! And it only tends to make it worse! So, whenever the tension begins to build, slowly and deeply breathe in...and slowly out. Again, in and out. Continue to do this exercise until your spinning world seems to slow enough to have some sense of control albeit only a small bit!
Secondly, try your best to focus on things which fill you with joy! (Always remember that "happy" and "joy" are only distant cousins not twins!!!! ) What fills you with such delight or awe or makes you stand in wonder? Those are the things you need to do to fill as many hours a day as you can! Children playing and giggling? Beautiful fall leaves blowing int eh wind? Puppies romping? Reading a good book? Baking? Distracting yourself by cleaning the junk drawer? (Sometimes that is really a good one as you come across lost items or things that bring back good memories! That project can stretch into a journey of hours!!)
Okay, you get the idea. It is not easy, but amazingly the time does pass, and not to far in the future you will no longer be anticipating anything but a cancer-free, wonderful life!
Know we will be beside you on the 22, holding your hand and making sure they take good care of you!! Please let us know how you are doing.
Blessings.
Rachael
Just when the caterpillar thought her world was over, she became a butterfly! Don't give up five minutes before the miracle!!