Skip to content
Feeling Disrespected
golfenhancement posted:
Husbands, I am feeling disrespected. My wife of 23 yrs. has undergone a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction three days ago. She was diagnosed with left DCIS in June of 2013. Since her diagnosis I have heard multiple comments from her friends, family and co-workers about looking forward to seeing and touching her new "ta-tas, boobies, and tits". They have gone as far as to "jokingly" offer raffel tickets or to take donations to feel and/or see her new breast.
I feel that my wife is being reduced to a pair of fake breast and I do not like it. Yesterday she asked me if I wanted to see them and I had to force myself to look. It was not because I felt turned off by the healing scars or the reduction from a 36DD to a 36C but I no longer felt special. I no longer felt like I was the only one, able to appreciate the woman I was blessed to have for 23 yrs.
Women and cancer survivors I will express my feelings with my wife. I am trying to put her feelings above mine. I want to be sensitive to her healing and means of coping by allowing the comments to continue. However, I need to speak before anger becomes sin.

Women, cancer survivors
georgiagail responded:
I'm not sure why you believe you should feel special and why you should express your feelings to your wife.

It seems these comments are coming from her friends, family and co-workers and those are the ones you might want to discuss toning down their comments. On the other hand, they may simply not know what else to say in the face of her serious medical issues and may be trying to bring some humor in the face of cancer which typically terrifies most people.


Helpful Tips

How to more easily read discussions
Exchanges provide a more dynamic way to keep up with ongoing discussions. But If you're finding how discussions and responses are ... More
Was this Helpful?
28 of 47 found this helpful

Related Drug Reviews

  • Drug Name User Reviews

Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

For more information, visit the Duke Health Breast Cancer Center