I've been reading people's stories for a while now but never was part of any discussions until I read yours. You've been through so much and still say you're blessed, that is absolutely amazing ! Very positive attitude. That's what inspired me to write. I've been dealing with Fibromyalgia for quite sometime now and part of that comes with sleepless nights because of pain which leads to exhaustion. Most recently I've been experiencing every symptom of chronic fatigue. At first I thought that i was just having a major crash and bouts of the flu. It was explained to me by a Physician that also has CFS in terms that made absolute sense and I know that it's definitely CFS. Apparently the 2 can go hand in hand. To me it sounds like you are dealing with CFS as well. There are so many meds on the market but nothing cures either ailments, you have to "learn to live with it". Rest, rest, and more rest. I as well have always been active, worked out, ran, aerobics, you name it. But thats my past life, I no longer can do the things I use to and if I even try to do what my Dr. recommends (very short walks, 3 mins of cardio, yoga) I pay dearly for days to come. I'm not sure which is worse at this point, pain or exhaustion. I have become very depressed which is as bad as the other symptoms and just as debilitating. I'm so lost right now and I feel so guilty because I have 4 children (2yrs-18yrs) that are very active with sports and it's overwhelming to even have the energy to sit and watch. I work approximately 32hrs per wk but it feels like 80 ! My husband is so supportive, I couldn't do it without him, he does everything ! I guess when I read your story it put mine in perspective a little because you've been through so much but you say you are blessed. I wish I had your mind set and could look at the positive side of my life, it's just so hard when your in pain 24/7, can't sleep, exhausted, and feel as if you have the flu all the time. At my worse I carry a low grade fever for days, sore throat, swollen glands, and so tired that I wish i could sleep and never wake up. I'm sorry that I turned this into all about me but it's nice to get it off of my chest, my husband has heard it all lol and you truly did inspire me. I wish you all the best, keep your positive attitude. You truly are blessed in many ways. I hope you find the answers your searching for and ask lots of questions. Never settle for "it's all in your head or your just depressed" because you know your body better than anyone else, including Doctors. Best wishes from the bottom of my heart.