I am trying to convince my self and change myself but could not do so.I feel guilty of my feelings (when i feel bad on seeing pregnant women) More than that even when some one says they are pregnant i take it as bad news.(same time happy for them)I hate this mentality of mine and i am not like this before ttc.If some one has good job or some thing i never felt bad about it but i worked hard and got everything i wished and succeded .But only in the case of pregnancy even i worked hard i failed.
Though i know no matter what happens we should not loose hope still when i see that single line my hope breaks in to pieces(particularly in medicated cycles) and it takes time till mid cycle to build up.It has become routine every month.I feel if we face same problem again and again the intensity of pain reduces(as it becomes habit) but this is not happening here..i am seeing BFN for years now but i feel more or equal grief each month.
Also i feel all these ovulation medicines are getting me new problems(many times hormonal).Ofcourse they have positive side too but are working their part but not getting desired results.I think i need some break now from all these things(specially from ovulation medicines)atleast till next year.Not ready for IVF.Prefer IUI again when i start again next year.
I do not think it is anything to feel bad for we are only humans so certain emotions we can not change. I find myself doing the same thing I have been TTC for 2 years now and have lost 2 babies so when i hear or see somebody pregnant I always start feeling bad for myself wondering why its not me especially when I have doctors help to conceive. It is the mental stress that makes me want to take a break after this cycle until next year somtimes it feels like im going crazy with all these baby thoughts and yet i still have to try to keep a positive attitude through all the heart break. Best wishes to you and all of us who are TTC.
Just know you're not alone. We all feel that way, at least at one time or another. I still feel bitter and resentful when people get pregnant easily, or if their pregnancy seems to be extremely easily...especially after my recent miscarriage. I know it's jealousy making me feel this way, and I'm not particularly proud of it. It just comes with the territory. As chaos said, we're only human with human emotions and needs.
Maybe a break will do you some good. It sounds like many ladies here are going to be taking a break over the holiday season to start back up next year. There's nothing wrong with taking some time off if you need it. Just don't give up completely.
Me 23, DH 25, TTC 2 years,BFP 10/4, MC 10/8, waiting to try again
just finished my last pill of chlomid on sunday days 3-7 should be O any day now have a scheduled folicle exam on 11/19 and IUI but i think I will O before then. Good Luck to us all this round hopefully this will be it for all of us.
If you have any concerns on this just call the doc and ask
Because with clomid mostly there is chance to ovulate any day from cd 11 to cd 21 and most of the docs call for exam from cd11....so dont hesitate to ask the dr for the exam in advance because it is you who will suffer at the end.
finally started my period yesteday after i finished the pills wednesday. i had pretty bad cramps but by 5 oclock i was okay. today they are fine and not has heavy as i thought i would be. I am calling the doc to make an u/s appt and hopefully get on femera. he wanted to put me on 100 mg of clomid instead of 50mg last time we talked but i would like to try femera. i am so happy i finally started(didnt think i would ever say that) i feel like i can finally move forward there for over a month my husband and i felt like we were at a stand still, just waiting.
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