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lostandlooking posted:
I was with a guy that i thought i loved for a while. I am not the type to open myself up to anyone and i had allowed him to see more sides to me than anyone i had known for years; be it family or friends. A few months into seeing eachother i had discovered that i was pregnant. I hadnt thought i was. But i also hadnt been paying attention to my period. Anyway i was in shock and i was scared and i had no idea what i was going to do. He was there with me through this whole situation. He had a couple kids anyway so he knew what to do and how to react. I had genuinely expected this reaction from him seeing as he had proved himself to be somewhat of an never ending philanthropist. I loved him. I was having alot of fears that something may go wrong. Alot of fears that he had not wanted to acknowledge because of the fact that he wanted this child and the life that he fantasized with me more than anything. This baby to him was the key to this life. At about almost twelve weeks in i had some heavy cramping and bleeding. Then i had discovered that my fears had come true, I had miscarried. I callled him to let him know that i went to the emergency room and he really needed to call me back. It took him a day and a half to call me back and when i told him what happened he branded me a liar told me that he knew i really had an abortion which of course never happened nand he told me that he couldnt talk to me. I called him every day for two weeks wanting an explanation for the reaction and basically to shorten what had happened between us, he always blamed me and made me feel horrible about myself. I have this never ending aching that i cant fill. I wake-up everyday feeling empty while he gets to be with someone else and move on with his life and be happy. I can't be happy and i cant move on. I put on a brave face in front of everyone. BBut i feel so empty. I feel like i am hollow, that there is nothing more to me than a simple rock. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I cant even cry. I dont know what to do anymore.I havent had a relationship in two years and i found that i drink alot lately. Its not fair. I am stuck with this never ending pain and he has nothing to make him feel anything like this. He can just pretend i never exhisted and that none of this ever happeened. Its not fair, i want to move past this but how?

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ajohnson08099 responded:
I just wanted to tell you I am so sorry for your losses. That is not fair what your SO did to you about the situation, and sure adds insult to injury. But perhaps he was just as surprised as you were about what happened.

If he was callous enough to have already moved on and be with someone else I would try and do the same for yourself. Its hard, definately, and I think you would definately benefit finding a group or an individual to talk to that won't judge you.

If you wanted, and I say this simply on a vengeful woman stand point.. Drop the ER bill in his mailbox, PROVE that you didn't have an abortion...

I think in the end though you are better off without someone that could just up and leave like that. Its extremely hard to open up and I'm sorry you got burned the first time you had in a long time. Rely on family and friends in this time and realize that you are worth so much more than how you have been treated.

Again I am extremely sorry for your losses. I wish you the best of luck. Keep your head up!


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