Skip to content


    Exciting News for WebMD Members!

    We've been busy behind the scenes building new message boards for you. You'll have new and easier ways to find messages, connect with others, and share your stories.

    And, this will all be available on your smartphone or other mobile device!

    What Do You Need to Do?

    The message board you're used to will be closing in the coming weeks. While many of your boards will be making the move to our new home, your posts will not. Want to keep a discussion going? Save posts you want to continue (this includes your member profile story), so that you can re-post them in the new message boards.

    Keep an eye here and on your email inbox, we'll be back in touch soon to give you all the information you need!

    Yours in health,
    WebMD Message Boards Management

    Lost my son at 22 weeks
    JLF1975 posted:
    Here is my story in brief:

    On October 29th we went in for our ultrasound where we could learn the sex of the baby if we chose to. The tech did a quick scan and seemed to be having trouble with it. After a bit she left to get the doctor. He came in and said he had some concerns. He said the baby was measuring small and there appeared to be some problems with the placenta. he arranged for us to see a specialist the following week. I went home nervous but thinking maybe the tech just made a mistake. The following week, November 4th I went to the specialist alone. I was lying on the table and the tech rushed through the scan. I had a sinking feeling in my stomache. the doc came in and began to do his own scan. Then my whole world came crashing down. he put his hand on mine and all I heard was "I'm so sorry, There is no cardiac activity." I have never felt such pain in my life. I stumbled out of there in a haze to go tell my husband our baby was dead. The next morning I went to the hospital to deliver the baby. I was induced at 7am and my son, Dale, was born sleeping at 12:00 November 5th. I cannot even begin to describe the pain I felt at the deafening silence that accompanied his birth. Now every day I wake up with a hole in my chest. I feel lost and alone all the time. My husband seems to be handling the grief well but I'm not. There is no joy, nothing but emptiness. I don't cry as much as I used to but it still feels wrong. I want my baby back.
    Nicolentampa responded:
    I feel your pain. I was 5 1/2 months pregnant on 3/11/2010. I went to the hospital because of severe pain. To make a long story short, they said that I had gas & sent me home.(The Doctor never even saw me, only nurses). I got up to use the bathroom a couple of hours later & my baby came out violently in the toilet stool.My daughter lived for about 2 hours and I had to have a birth certificate & a death certificate dated the same day. I remember every detail of that day & a year later it is still incredibly painful. You will have happy days and sad days. People will mean well when they say silly little things so don't get offended. I want my baby back too, but it will never happen. I can't tell you how to deal with it because I'm still having trouble myself , but I can tell you that you are not alone. I understand EXACTLY what you are going through. I think about my daughter every day.
    myRaymond responded:
    I am going through this agony, pain, emptiness, and longing for my son Raymond Lee as well. And the sad part is I have 2 healthy kids a boy and a girl. But I feel so ungreatful because I say Lord I want my Raymond here too. We planned for him to be here, he wasn't a accident. It is very hard but I pray for it will get better for all of us who are going through this. I hope you have some good support and I am going to see a councelor, I hope it helps. Take it one day at a time. Peace and Love
    mendezwife responded:
    I am grieving with you all! my husband & I just lost our twin sons on Feb 21st. Just 2 wks ago. I was 23 wks & they just came too soon. 1st son lived for 17 mins & 2nd son lived for 13 hrs.
    We too have ss cards, b cert & d cert. I vag gave birth to them on a mon & by fri my husband & I were burrying them.

    The feelings of emptyness, saddness, hurt, anger.........all of it, haunt me everyday. We too planned for this baby & when we learned we were having twin boys we were just so happy & blessed! (after the shock wore off! ha)

    I dont have to keep going all know what Id say & how to feel. Lean on your family, husbands & friends. Get counseling & lean on the Lord, for his trust is what we know & need. He has our babies for a reason & what better place for them to be if they are not here w us. I send my love & support to all of you who lost. Just typing this I'm crying.

    myRaymond replied to mendezwife's response:
    I do apologize for losing two special angels. And you are so right what better place for our babies to be than in the arms of the Lord in heaven. During this time we really have to lean on the Lord because you will lose your mind if you focus on anything else. I pray peace and understanding for you and will keep you in my prayers. Much peace and love
    mendezwife replied to myRaymond's response:
    Thank you & I too keep all us ladies in my prayers that one day we will be blessed again & be able to hold our babies & bring them home!
    God Bless!
    An_232516 replied to myRaymond's response:
    Myraymond, I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing. We are in a similar situation. We found out today that wemlost our baby at 20 weeks. There was never any indication before today and all sonograms including last week showed a perfect baby. I also have two older children, but did plan this baby and feel so sad and cheated.
    myRaymond replied to An_232516's response:
    Hello An_232516 I am so very sorry to hear about the worst nightmare in the world. And you are absouletly correct you do feel cheated. Nothing in the world compares to the tragedy of losing a child. But look at this positive atleast you have your very own personal angel. Even though it is bad you always have someone looking at you. When you are not feeling well and you feel an extra breeze that is your angel saying hello mommy now get better. I truly understand how and what you feel. I have my good days and I have BAD DAYS. But I know this is something I will always live with and eventually I pray and hope it will get bearable. I also have two living kids but it's nothing like having all your kids together. Sorry for my delay in response my computer has been down. But I will keep you in m prayers. Much Peace, love and understanding.

    Spotlight: Member Stories

    I'm a mother of two grown sons, have a great daughter-in-law, granddaughter and grandson. I have fibromyalgia and by the early/mid 90's tha...More

    Helpful Tips

    How to more easily read discussions
    Exchanges provide a more dynamic way to keep up with ongoing discussions. But If you're finding how discussions and responses are ... More
    Was this Helpful?
    10 of 20 found this helpful

    Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

    FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.