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Prison time.
GuardSquealer posted:
Last night one of my inmate workers was in the room while I was on the computer. She asked if I could look and see if it showed her being released in a couple weeks. So I pulled her up. I had never looked to see why she was incarcerated. But when I pulled her up it showed her charge as vehicular homocide. Usually those are our best inmates. Typically it is someone that had an accident driving while under the influence of something. They usually aren't career criminals just someone that made a bad choice. And she fits that bill. Very intelligent, soft spoken, and a hard worker.

So I asked her if she was driving intoxicated. She just replied in a sad voice. "I had an accident". I got distracted and didn't say anything else. Another inmate that was in the room with us started asking her more questions. And I overheard her telling her that her child died in the accident. She had the child in the wrong type of car seat according to the police and they filed charges against her. She basically said the railroaded her and she wound up getting sent to prison for it. I guess her kid was in a booster type seat and they said she should have been in a infant style seat.

Either way I don't feel that this is a type of offense that warrants prison time. I have a hard time believing that she would have put the child in the wrong type of seat knowing it could cause the child to die. And if the idea of going to prison is to get you to not do the crime again, I am pretty sure the death of her child taught her a pretty important lesson about using the proper type of car seat for your child.

Obviously it is horrible that the childs death could probably have been avoided had she been in the proper type of restraint. But does anyone believe that going to prison was the solution to the problem? I talked to her a little bit about it later, and she started crying saying she never had time to grieve the death since she immeadiately had to start her defense.
cjh1203 responded:
What a horrible, horrible, heartbreaking story. It's incomprehensible that a mother could go to jail for a mistake like that. It seems like intent would be the major factor, and she obviously didn't intend to put her child in a car seat that could get her killed. That poor woman. I really hate knowing that things like that can happen.
MissCaptainKirk responded:
OMG I almost cried reading terrible.
Idk if you can tell her this, but I'll be keeping her in my thoughts and I hope she is able to grieve and find peace, and get out of jail.
3point14 responded:
I think she deserves jail time. Not a huge amount, and with no huge security measures and hopefully with a lot of counseling and prayer, but yeah a child died. The kid didn't die from buying the wrong car seat, the kid died in a car accident. I know it's an accident, and obviously that's completely horrifying, and I'm sure that poor woman is going through utter hell being there. But I think to not have her face legal consequences puts the suffering she's going through ahead of the justice that child deserves.

The legal system is designed to solve problems, like by getting dangerous people off the streets and enforcing laws to protect people: but it's also the justice system, and when a child dies in a way that could've been avoided, I do believe the people responsible deserve punishment.

That being said, I couldn't do the job you do, Guard. I admire so much the compassion you show to those you're in charge of. I couldn't stand being around all that suffering, and even though the cynic in me says she deserves punishment, it's cases like that that are just so heartbreaking. Bless you for treating them with dignity.
Spankyrae responded:
A booster seat vs. a baby car seat? That is a big difference, isn't it? I guess it would depend on the age of the child too.
123as responded:
In now way do I think she deserves jail time. An accident is an accident, i'm sure it was not her intention of putting her child in a seat that was not the correct one (meaning she thought the seat was fine), and i'm sure it was not her intention to get into an ACCIDENT. That just makes me sick! Poor lady, losing a baby is HORRIBLE and to have to sit in prison for an ACCIDENT how sad.
You never know what you have until its gone. Cherish what you have before its gone. ME 23 SO 23 DD 7 DD 4 angel baby 1/7/10
stephs_3_kidz responded:
I don't know..

I guess it depends if she had an infant in a booster seat. KWIM. A very small baby that she KNEW shouldn't be in a booster seat?

My youngest is 32 pounds and booster seats in my state require a child to be at least 4 years old AND 40 pounds to be in a booster. If her kid was like, 3 1/2 and 38 pounds, no. But if the child didn't obviously fit into the booster seat (and you can tell when they don't!!) then she knew better, plain and simple.

However, my heart breaks for her because she made a stupid, stupid mistake and lost her child for it. She will have to attemp to live with that the rest of her life. I would say that is the worst punishment ever, and she is going to judge herself far more than any judge or jury.

FWIW, my 10yo son has to ride in a booster seat in order for the seat belt to fit him properly. He doesn't like it, but if he doesn't use it the seatbelt goes right across his neck. It's not worth the risk for us to let him go without it to keep his pride.
FCL responded:
I find myself wondering if the fathers who forget their babies on car parks at work in blistering sunlight face the same consequences ...

I think the poor woman was punished enough by the loss of her child. I cannot imagine being able to live (nor wanting to) after being responsible for the death of one of my children.
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
naggingwife74 replied to 3point14's response:
I have to say the stubborn side of me agrees, she should get jail time. (jail, not prison)

It is the job of a parent to protect and care for our children. An infant car seat is used for an infant, under 1 year. A toddler seat is used for a toddler, 40lbs & 4 years old. There is not a parent in the world that would think it is safe to put a baby in a booster seat. My dd is 5 and just went into the booster about 6 months ago because the seat belt would cut across her face, how could you not see that a baby doesn't fit in a regular carseat? I don't believe that this mother didn't know it wasn't safe.

I also agree she never would have done it if she knew the outcome. I am sure she thought it would be okay and she would drive safe. She didn't/couldn't plan for an accident. But, that's her job as a mother, to do everything in her power to protect her child from what "might" happen. There are always times that you can't control things like this but in her case, she had complete control of this babie's safety and life.

There has to be a punishment, this baby lost it's life. She was neglectful in the aspect of safety. Loosing her baby is a terrible punishment but sadness can't be a sentence. At some point the state has to step in and let people know they will be held accountable for their poor choices.
naggingwife74 replied to naggingwife74's response:
Okay, I re-read my reply and realized it sounded a little more harsh then I wanted it to.

I do have compassion for any mother that looses a child, no matter what the reason is for the death. There isn't a parent in the world that deserves to go through that. I feel for this woman and hope that she really does get released in a few weeks. I hope that she can cope and grieve her loss when she is released.

My feelings and compassion are a seperate issue from accountability. That is why I am not a part of the justice system, I would have a hard time seperating the two with cases like this.
alaska_mommy responded:
I don't think she should have gone to jail. But also I think it would merit knowing more about how young the child was...maybe they were just on the edge of being too big for the infant seat but too small to go into the booster yet...IDK. If it was a really obvious difference, like a little baby in a booster, then, yeah, it was wrong. But the child safety laws change so much, she might have thought she was doing the right thing and then ended up not. Who knows.
naggingwife74 replied to alaska_mommy's response:
I agree about the laws changing so much, it is hard to keep up with what you are suppose to be doing. The thing that bothered my was there is a toddler seat between the infant seat and the booster. So it would be hard to imagine it being a transition since one seat was completely skipped. You can't really go from an infant seat to a booster since you have to be 4 to be in a booster and you have to be out of the infant seat at 1. (around 4 & around 1)
alaska_mommy replied to naggingwife74's response:
Yeah we got a toddler seat for our 18 month old when he was just under a year. At least ours is a convertible and will last until he is 100lbs. Thank God
I wonder with this woman if money was an issue at all? Maybe she didn't feel she could afford a toddler seat and was trying to make do with what she had? Who knows the reasons for why she did it. I think the reasons would make a big difference in whether she should or shouldn't be in jail.
Foreverinyoureyes2 responded:
I used to work at an upscale retail store in my town, and the saddest thing that I ever helped out with, was a mom coming into to get a burial outfit for her 1 year old baby.

The Grandma had the child for the day, and was driving somewhere. Apparantly the baby would not stop crying, so Grandma took the baby out of her car seat and was driving with the baby in her lap, and had an accident. The Grandma suffered no injury.

There were no charges in this case, but it was about 18-20 years ago, and things were a little different back then.

I remember telling my own Grandma about this incident and she said that when her kids were small not only were there no car seats, there were not even seat belts in some cars.

I get stuck on the legalities tho. Clearly the mom meant her child no harm, and she will suffer more than any court or prison can enforce upon her. Isn't there a case pending right now where a mom was J-walking and her toddler ran into traffic and was hit by a car and killed, and the mom is facing charges for negligence, but the vehicle driver is not?

Bad things can happen in an instant to any one of us. I try not to judge, because I have probably made stupid decisions or mistakes that only by the grace of God have turned out ok. Kwim?

I hope she gets far less time than mother's that starve their babies, or lock them in closets, or allow their live-in boyfriends to hurt, maim or kill them.
tmlmtlrl replied to Foreverinyoureyes2's response:
Listen, she made a mistake that combined with an unforeseen accident resulted in the death of her baby!! She does not deserve to be locked up. If a punishment needs to be made then why not mandatory counseling, parenting classes and community service and maybe some fines?? Why not something that would make some kind of sense.

She put her baby in the wrong car seat. We don't know why or if she knew it was wrong. We can guess she didn't know there was going to be an accident down the road. What we do know is she is remorseful and in prison. This is sad and a misuse of the prison system if you ask me.

As far as the other woman you referred to, I signed a petition for her to not be locked up. The details of her case were that she took public transportation. The bus stop was directly across the street from her apartment. It was in the evening and instead of going I think it was a quarter mile up the road to the crosswalk with her 3 kids she chose to cross right there and her child was hit by a DRUNK driver. The drunk driver was given 6 MONTHS and she is looking at 2 YEARS for not using the crosswalk. Because somehow a crosswalk would've prevented a drunk driver from running her baby down?!

Anyhow, not only is she facing 2yrs but her other children who just saw their sibling die are facing losing their mother for 2yrs on top of it.

We can be anal and all black and white about the justice system but it just does not always work that way. The reality of what is best after such a tragedy first of all is unknown but it seriously can't be to lock up the mother....not in these cases.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results.

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