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This Exchange simulates the original Couples Coping Support Group. It is designed to help persons with concerns in their relationships, family, marriage, seperation, divorce, etc.Offering a wide range of real world, personal experiences, information, knowledge, suggestions, & views from real people.
Double Dates- Poll
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kristinmarie722 posted:
Whats everyone's opinions on them?
Pros?
Cons?

Good places or activities for double dates?

Best people to double date with? (mutual friends, friends of one half, family, etc.)
Reply
 
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GuardSquealer responded:
I guess it depends on what you call dating. I consider dating as what happens early in a relationship. When you are still getting to know each other. At that point double dating is ok as it helps ease that tension and ackwardness of those dates where you aren't sure what to say, etc.

And probably mutual friends or at least friends of one half, are the best. Of course for a guy if you take your goofy buddy with you it can actually not go so well. So I guess you should be selective. Activities such as bowling or things where you can talk / versus watching a movie are probably better.

Once you are in a committed relationship I consider it just doing stuff together. And there is doing stuff with other couples.

My wife and I have been so busy for the last 15 years we have pretty much lost contact with most of our old friends. We recently started doing stuff with another couple that has a mutual interest in the same horse stuff we do, so that has been a nice change of pace. We actually went on vacation with them and it was a lot of fun. We did somethings together and some things seperate. It was a nice change of pace.
 
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kristinmarie722 replied to GuardSquealer's response:
Oooh I dont think you are ever too old to date, or been in a relationship too long to call it a "date".

Even when I lived with my ex I made him take me on dates.

There is something different about calling it "a date". For me anyways. There is more planning involved. More anticipation.

I bet if you told your wife- I am taking you on date tonight- she would get excited.

My SO and I are going on a date tonight- Apps and drinks and we have been texting each other all day with lovey texts, etc.

To me, dating is something planned and something to get excited about. It's what keeps the excitement alive!!!!!!
 
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candy352 replied to kristinmarie722's response:
I agree! Never too old to date. I think that keeps the relationship fresh. My SO and I have regular date nights. We haven't had a chance to double date because we don't really know any other couples here. But some good activities for double dates are movies or a fair. Those are always super fun in a group. I don't think I would like to do a dinner as a double date. I like to have that time to ourselves.
Candy 26, DF 36, PG with 1st child, EDD 1/6/12
 
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BalconyBelle replied to candy352's response:
I'm really looking forward to being able to date my fiance again, the whole living 1,000 miles apart thing blows. I'll get to see him for a couple of days during Winter Break, and we're already dreaming about what we'll do for our dates and visit during that time. We've been together for nearly 6 years now, & like candy352 & kristinmarie722, we feel we're never too old, or too established as a couple to date.

Even after we're married, we still plan on date nights~it's great, it's romantic, it's fun, and it's a special way of clearing the evening/day for the one you love & keeping the spark alive...it's something to get excited about & look forward to. We've done double dates at restaurants, Main Event, A-Kon, midnight movie premieres, ect...but our favorites are the times when we can focus on each other.
http://erynlockhart.wordpress.com
 
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3point14 responded:
I like doubling early in a relationship because it's a good way to assess how your SO is going to get along with your friends without it feeling like job interview. I've always enjoyed a group date or a double date, but I think it's easy (at least for me) to sometimes get caught up in the group dynamic (even if they aren't my friends) and somewhat neglect the SO. So it's important for me to remember not to do that too much.

My favorite things to do on a double date are pretty cheesy stuff, I love Pictionary and Scrabble and anything lightly competitive but not too physical. I like to do things that don't have huge potential to go awkward, like hikes always turn out badly because there's always someone who gets left behind or just isn't into it. I don't want to do something that has the potential to start a fight either, I like games with very easy-to-understand instructions so it's easy to follow so nobody gets confused/annoyed.

I like, when picking other couples to hang out with, to be with fun, generally happy people whose relationship is going well. I have this one set of friends who are fun individually but always fighting so that's turned into a huge letdown whenever we try to hang out. In general though, I'm open to my friends, his friends, whatever.
 
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Spankyrae responded:
I agree! You're never too old to have dates and it seems a lot of couples lose touch with doing that and the mood that comes with a date. Plus, a date is great foreplay.

As for double-dating, we rarely do it. I think that's because he's just a private person. I like it from time to time, and we've had a few with some married friends of his. Now I'm thinking, why not my friends? Oh, I can only think of one couple... Hmm, I guess we stay inside our own bubble.

I would say anyplace is good for groups, but not something too personal or romantic. Unless the group stuff is your thing... then game night with Twister would probably be a great idea.
http://www.AConleyCreation.com/
http://CreativeBlossoming.wordpress.com
 
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Spankyrae responded:
On Nate Berkus' show yesterday, he had Patti Stanger (Millionaire Matchmaker---one of my guilty pleasures), with a married couple that had gotten into a romantic and sexual rut. They had kids, and Patti suggested that for those with kids who can't afford babysitters, offer an exchange program with another couple of parents. Say, you go out one weekend and they watch your kids, and then you do the same for them another weekend. I thought it was a great idea.
http://www.AConleyCreation.com/
http://CreativeBlossoming.wordpress.com
 
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kristinmarie722 replied to Spankyrae's response:
My sister and I used to do this before my ex and I split up. It was nice to have a babysitter and not have to pay for it!

Now my DS goes to his dad's every other weekend, and it's the same schedule for my SO's kids, so we have every other weekend, free for just us. It's really nice. Gives us time to reconnect.

I love double dating. I am a very social person anyways, so I like to be around people.

I think going bowling, playing pool, board games, etc are fun couple activites.


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