Couples Coping Support Group

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 5 years and I don't know if it's time to move on or if with help, we maybe have a chance. We're 29 and as of right now, we would both like things to work out and want to be together. Many discussions have been had; he isn't the best communicator and doesn't enjoy the seriousness of the topic coming up so often here lately, but he tries and I appreciate that.
Basically, it feels as if there is less of a connection between us and the intimacy department is really feeling a drought. He is more of a worry free/go with the flow type of person and I am definitely more of a planner/analyzer type. We met through friends and liked each other immediately. We didn't live so close at first and then he had a job working nights, so the first few years were spent developing a relationship by phone during the week and in person on the weekends. He has always been way ahead of me in the relationship...he fell faster, said I love you first, had more sexual experience, etc. I did have walls up and was just trying to be careful of my heart. Looking back now, I see the time frame in the last two years where things maybe started to spiral some. I thought then that something may be going on with him-a feeling of wanting to stay young while he sees a lot of friends getting married/having babies. He seemed to develop an attitude that was very much...I'm not getting old and I'm going to do whatever makes me happy. I have never pushed any kind of timeline on marriage/kids. We talk about it, but only in a check-in type of way, is it something we both see in the future, etc. Also in looking back and things that he has said about the past, I may have felt this spiral and distance growing then and became more controlling over things in the relationship, decisions, etc. He recently talked about this time and mentioned that he felt like I was a boss not a girlfriend.

Just this year he took a job where the shift changes every three months between days and nights and that has seemed to only put the relationship in more distress. Now it feels as if we have exchanged spots...I am very much in love with him and he says he loves me but doesn't know if it's enough anymore. Maybe this is because I took too long to jump in with both feet and to love completely? Too little too late? This is where I should also add that about a year ago I started experiencing life altering migraines almost daily. Everything was affected as a result and only very recently have I felt some relief after many doctors. I am starting to regain a daily life again. He stood by me through all of this and was a great caretaker, but it was no easy task for him I'm sure. I know he dealt with a very difficult person who never felt well and he says had a terrible attitude most days. He says this and the previous bossy time really took a toll on him and that things are tainted now...that he needs time to see if things can rebound. I don't want to lose him. I am so scared that what is lost won't return for him, all while my feelings are stronger than ever. It is evident that there is a problem. He doesn't hug, kiss, or have sex with me but maybe once a month. I feel strongly for him, yet he is so out of reach. I don't know what to do. He is on day shift now and we decided to take the three months to really work on our relationship. I have improved quite a bit, just my health alone helped greatly. I am working on myself, my attitude, etc. The three months are up at the end of this month. I see effort from him in some areas, but not at all in intimacy. He says he is doing the mental work first. But how can someone know if things can really rebound if there are no actions being explored? I am doing twice as much mental as I am actions, but I'm still doing the actions. I feel very unloved and rejected. What else can I or should I be doing? Where do we go from here? Help please.