Couples Coping Support Group

I have been dating a wonderful woman for close to 7 months now. We are both in our early 50's and divorced. In her case her divorce was 15 years ago. Over those 15 years she has dated a lot including one 5 year and one 6 year relationship. She has a demanding job in a school and so during the school year is very busy. She told me early on that most of her past relationships have ended because the man has wanted more of her time that she has to give.

After we met and dated for a bit she told me that she told a friend that she could "see marrying this guy." Later she started telling me what she liked in a wedding ring, talked about where we could live even looking a house listings, and talked about what we could do in retirement.

We seemed very close although she tends to be very reserved in her emotions expressing them best in texts and emails. Toward the end of the school year her life got extra hectic and reacted negatively when in an email I told her that she still took my breath away each time she opened the door when I went to pick her up for a date. To me that was just a nice compliment to say she always looks so nice and she does take my breath away but I wasn't trying to be over-the-top in that comment. That prompted her though to email me and say she was concerned as her feelings for me were not as strong and she worried there might be a mismatch. She wanted to slow things down and not do the daily phone calls, texts, and twice weekly dates. I said fine and respected that. Things went fine until a few weeks later I gave her a card for Mother's Day and once again she emailed me saying she thought we should quit dating as I needed someone who could love me to the extend I deserved and she couldn't kid herself into saying she loved me.

I responded to her concerns and she felt better and we kept dating and lately things seem to be getting better. Today though she emailed me and say I was "starting to do it again" mostly in Facebook for frequently "liking" and commenting on her posts. She said a friend said I appear to watch her posts like a hawk and seem a bit obsessive. She added that if I kept it up things would not work out between us. I wrote back and apologized and said I wasn't obsessive and just had a genuine interest in her life.

So she has a lot of boundaries. She said she likes the "occasional text and email" but if I pay her too much attention then she feels "suffocated." I love this woman to death but it's difficult because she has all these boundaries and if I cross them I hear about it. It's hard for me to know what's ok and what's not. I try hard to respect her wishes and always change as needed. My concern though is wondering if she will ever be comfortable getting into a more intimate relationship where you like the attention rather than feeling suffocated? I know she likes and cares for me but at times I think she wants an activities companion more than a love relationship. I know 7 months is not enough time to conclude anything. I just don't feel there is balance here. It's all about her needs, her boundaries, her schedule and I'm not sure she makes any allowances for me.

Anyone been in a relationship like this and have any advice? Push back? Give it more time?

Thanks