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This Exchange simulates the original Couples Coping Support Group. It is designed to help persons with concerns in their relationships, family, marriage, seperation, divorce, etc.Offering a wide range of real world, personal experiences, information, knowledge, suggestions, & views from real people.
Frustrated - No Sex
An_249518 posted:
My wife and i have had an up and down relationship. But I am at a spot now where I don't know what to do. I ask very little of my wife. One thing that I have made very clear is that I would very much like to have a sexual relationship with her. She says she's just not into it and doesn't enjoy it at all. So that's a problem and it hurt to hear that. however, i really need that in order to feel connected to her and to satisfy my own desires for her. she is beautiful, i tell her that often. but for whatever reason she is not willing to figure out how to be sexual with me. she does have a vibrator that she uses about 3-4 times a week (that kind of hurts too). so i am left to feel very inadequate, sexually unfulfilled and very distanced from her. how can i change this? what should i do to get her interseted or to at least OK with having sex again?
tlkittycat1968 responded:
If your wife isn't willing to meet you half way and have sex occasionally even when she isn't in the mood, there really isn't much you can do.
queston responded:
Have you ever used the vibrator during partnered sex? Perhaps you could ask her to show you how she likes to use it in masturbation?
GuardSquealer responded:
I agree with queston. Try buying a different vibrator just for use with the two of you. Buy something nice and better than what she has, then let her know in a nice way it is for use only when both of you are participating.
An_249530 responded:
Im sorry that you are going threw this, But to me it sounds like your wife may just be unhappy or possibly cheating? I know someone whom was in a similar situation and thats what it ended up being however i really hope that this isn't the case with your situation. Anyways i would just really let your wife know how you feel and let her know that it is hurting your feelings. I am sorry for what you going threw and i hope things get better.

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