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WebMD Community Talk Show

Serving up a new debate daily, this is the place where putting up your dukes and defending your opinion is encouraged.

Last Reply:

Do moms really multitask more than dads?

Olivia_WebMD_Staff posted:

A new study says it's true , and that women are also more negatively impacted by those extra duties.

Guys and gals"026chime in and tell us what you think. Is it true from your experience? Do you do more than YOUR spouse? Argue your side of the story.

11 Replies |Watch This Discussion | Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?<a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504763_162-57334725-10391704/moms-have-it-harder-than-dads-multitasking-study-says-yes/">A new study says it's true</a> , and that women are also more negatively impacted by those extra duties. Guys and gals"026chime in and tell us what you think. Is it true from your experience? Do you do more than YOUR spouse? Argue your side of the story.

queston responded:

I think it's true. I am a man and my wife and I divide domestic and family chores fairly evenly. But I've also noticed than I do more than the vast majority of husbands. (I do all of the cooking and grocery shopping, we share cleaning and laundry, etc).

So what that says to me is that the vast majority of husbands are doing less than their wives, in terms of domestic and family work.

(This applies to two-income families--obviously, if one is a stay-at-home parent then that changes the dynamic.)

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?I think it's true. I am a man and my wife and I divide domestic and family chores fairly evenly. But I've also noticed than I do more than the vast majority of husbands. (I do all of the cooking and grocery shopping, we share cleaning and laundry, etc). So what that says to me is that the vast majority of husbands are doing less than their wives, in terms of domestic and family work. (This applies to two-income families--obviously, if one is a stay-at-home parent then that changes the dynamic.)

Lysana responded:

My husband typically does more around the house than I do (I work full-time, he works part-time), but I think I multi-task better than he does. IF I am making an effort to get things done, I will usually get a greater variety of things done in a shorter period of time. But they have to be straightforward things for me, like cooking, dishes, getting kids ready for bed, etc - I am awful at organizing, and if I don't know where something goes, it's likely to end up just about anywhere, when something else comes up.

These days, since I'm pregnant, I am not as good at multi-tasking as I am when not pregnant. I am much more easily overwhelmed when lots of things are going on at once (especially when the kids get wild and loud!)

But that doesn't mean I do more around the house. He definitely does more, overall.

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?My husband typically does more around the house than I do (I work full-time, he works part-time), but I think I multi-task better than he does. IF I am making an effort to get things done, I will usually get a greater variety of things done in a shorter period of time. But they have to be straightforward things for me, like cooking, dishes, getting kids ready for bed, etc - I am awful at organizing, and if I don't know where something goes, it's likely to end up just about anywhere, when something else comes up. These days, since I'm pregnant, I am not as good at multi-tasking as I am when not pregnant. I am much more easily overwhelmed when lots of things are going on at once (especially when the kids get wild and loud!) But that doesn't mean I do more around the house. He definitely does more, overall.

RoseLynn02 responded:

I think in most cases it's true, although occasionally you have the above & beyond exceptional husband who will do more than if not at least his fair share. I do most things for our family. All my husband does is work & I do everything else, but my husband is an OTR trucker (over the road) so it's not like he is really able to pitch in much to begin with. Also, I've seen my husband try to multitask & it always ends in disaster.

He isn't good at it at all. He is always happy to help, but only with one thing at a time. So with that in mind, I tend to just run the house hold myself. I can get more done at once & then things get done faster that way.

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?I think in most cases it's true, although occasionally you have the above & beyond exceptional husband who will do more than if not at least his fair share. I do most things for our family. All my husband does is work & I do everything else, but my husband is an OTR trucker (over the road) so it's not like he is really able to pitch in much to begin with. Also, I've seen my husband try to multitask & it always ends in disaster. <img src="http://img.webmd.com/community/images/smile.gif" align="top" border="0"> He isn't good at it at all. He is always happy to help, but only with one thing at a time. So with that in mind, I tend to just run the house hold myself. I can get more done at once & then things get done faster that way. <img src="http://img.webmd.com/community/images/smile.gif" align="top" border="0">

orin34 responded:

This is a topic of much contention in my home. I wasn't working until recently. When I wasn't working I did everything.... and I complained very little about my husbands bad habits. Now I am working in the day, picking my son up at day care, and going about the nightly routine. I don't get "me time" until 8 PM. My husband just recently got a second job which makes these bad habits of his MUCH worse. Every morning when I come downstairs there are dinner dishes in the living room with food on them (yuk). Or snotty tissues all over the place.... I understand that he works two jobs, and I am fully willing to take care of the dishes he uses IF he puts them in the kitchen. And the snot tissue balls? sorry, that is just gross.
So yes..... around the house I do more (but HE works more). We are still trying to figure things out, the 'negative impact' thing is spot on. I find myself holding A LOT back but still getting super angry about certain things. Holding it together so my son doesn't see it is a major stress.

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?This is a topic of much contention in my home. I wasn't working until recently. When I wasn't working I did everything.... and I complained very little about my husbands bad habits. Now I am working in the day, picking my son up at day care, and going about the nightly routine. I don't get "me time" until 8 PM. My husband just recently got a second job which makes these bad habits of his MUCH worse. Every morning when I come downstairs there are dinner dishes in the living room with food on them (yuk). Or snotty tissues all over the place.... I understand that he works two jobs, and I am fully willing to take care of the dishes he uses IF he puts them in the kitchen. And the snot tissue balls? sorry, that is just gross. So yes..... around the house I do more (but HE works more). We are still trying to figure things out, the 'negative impact' thing is spot on. I find myself holding A LOT back but still getting super angry about certain things. Holding it together so my son doesn't see it is a major stress.

gymrat44 responded:

It's definitely true that women multitask better than men. I believe the hard-wiring of men's focusing on single tasks while women focus on a number of them simultaneously goes back to very early society. Men needed to be focused on the hunt to stay alive and bring home the needed meat. Women needed to focus on two or more things at the same time in order to do any household task while also keeping an eye on one or more children.

But hold the phone here -- an inherent inability to multi-task does not mean than men cannot or do not do as much as women can. It just needs to be recognized that we guys will do things differently, often to the uncomprehending consternation of women. One must calmy point out that it's the results which matter, not necessarily the method. We men and women need to keep on acknowledging our differences and use that understanding to come to better and more amicable outcomes. And since we guys are poor at multi-tasking it may take us longer to do the same thing. Therefore it should be accomplishment which matches, not necessarily the amount of time expended to get housework (or anything else) done.

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?It's definitely true that women multitask better than men. I believe the hard-wiring of men's focusing on single tasks while women focus on a number of them simultaneously goes back to very early society. Men needed to be focused on the hunt to stay alive and bring home the needed meat. Women needed to focus on two or more things at the same time in order to do any household task while also keeping an eye on one or more children. But hold the phone here -- an inherent inability to multi-task does not mean than men cannot or do not do as much as women can. It just needs to be recognized that we guys will do things differently, often to the uncomprehending consternation of women. One must calmy point out that it's the results which matter, not necessarily the method. We men and women need to keep on acknowledging our differences and use that understanding to come to better and more amicable outcomes. And since we guys are poor at multi-tasking it may take us longer to do the same thing. Therefore it should be accomplishment which matches, not necessarily the amount of time expended to get housework (or anything else) done.

brunosbud replied to orin34's response:

Re-read your marriage license! There's a section on "snot tissue balls"...

Jeeze........amateurs!

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?Re-read your marriage license! There's a section on "snot tissue balls"... Jeeze........amateurs!

ami_nix responded:

In my household, my SO does almost everything around the house but, he stays home with our 7 month old son. I do what I can when I'm not working huge amounts of OT but, he tends to get almost everything done before I get home. If I had to say, I think he does more than I do..

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?In my household, my SO does almost everything around the house but, he stays home with our 7 month old son. I do what I can when I'm not working huge amounts of OT but, he tends to get almost everything done before I get home. If I had to say, I think he does more than I do..

Rod_Moser_PA_PhD replied to ami_nix's response:

I constantly multi-task....hold on, just a second. Sorry, I had to answer answer the phone and feed the dogs. So far this AM, I have sorted and organized tax papers, wrote two blogs, answered a half-dozen postings on the ENT community board, talked to my daughter, two of my sons,and my brother, reorganized the living room to accomodate a new television (the old one...12 years old...is going to a museum...literally!), researched a Japanese woodblock that I thought was by Hokasai, and found to be a Hiroshige), emptied the ashes from the fireplace, prepared dinner for my wife (she is working today and I am off), and read a chapter on my Clive Cussler book.

What I have NOT done today is take a shower...it is now 8 PM.

I feel like I have not accomplished anything on my day-off.

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?I constantly multi-task....hold on, just a second. Sorry, I had to answer answer the phone and feed the dogs. So far this AM, I have sorted and organized tax papers, wrote two blogs, answered a half-dozen postings on the ENT community board, talked to my daughter, two of my sons,and my brother, reorganized the living room to accomodate a new television (the old one...12 years old...is going to a museum...literally!), researched a Japanese woodblock that I thought was by Hokasai, and found to be a Hiroshige), emptied the ashes from the fireplace, prepared dinner for my wife (she is working today and I am off), and read a chapter on my Clive Cussler book. What I have NOT done today is take a shower...it is now 8 PM. I feel like I have not accomplished anything on my day-off.

janlooks1 responded:

Thats not always the case my son works 2 jobs full time, food shops, runs the kids to their games, cooks, cleans house, and does all the family big purchases, I think that is multitasking

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?Thats not always the case my son works 2 jobs full time, food shops, runs the kids to their games, cooks, cleans house, and does all the family big purchases, I think that is multitasking

janlooks1 replied to Lysana's response:

Thanks for being Honest

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?Thanks for being Honest

missashley1010 responded:

I just recently had a baby and before I had him I did all the work around my house. Now that im back to work my BF has to do the cleaning and cooking and taking care of are son..he says oh my gosh how do you do this! I think us ladies do handle multi tasking a tad bit better. If it comes to playing video games, eating a sandwich, and texting at the same time my BF could handle that

Report This| Share this:Do moms really multitask more than dads?I just recently had a baby and before I had him I did all the work around my house. Now that im back to work my BF has to do the cleaning and cooking and taking care of are son..he says oh my gosh how do you do this! I think us ladies do handle multi tasking a tad bit better. If it comes to playing video games, eating a sandwich, and texting at the same time my BF could handle that <img src="http://img.webmd.com/community/images/smile.gif" align="top" border="0">

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