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An_253240 posted:
Never been to one of these sites before but here goes. I lost my business last summer and had to move in with my mother because I couldn't make ends meet anymore. I've suffered from depression since I was 19 and I'm 47 now. No one in my family has the slightest understanding of what depression is about. I've tried to educate them but they don't believe in it. They treat me like I'm just lazy. I haven't had the money for any kind of treatment in years and being surrounded by people who treat me with blatant disdain, after going through a life altering experience like loosing my job, my home, 70% of my belongings and my entire way of life, I'm finding this to be more difficult than I can bare. I don't know anyone here, and I have no one to talk to. I'm in a deep dark hole and can't find a way out. I have no money and at this point I'm so deep into my depression I can't find the strength to find work. I don't know what I expect anyone here to be able to do for me but I guess I just needed to see if anyone out there understands what I'm going through. Thank you.
SharonNVirginia responded:
My family was in denial about depression when I first "came out" to them. I can empathize with what you are going through.

It is no wonder that you are deep in it considering the stress you have been under. Right now, no doubt, you can't see anything you can do to better your situation. As hard as it may be to hear, though, you can better your situation.

First, let's identify the endpoints that would make things better and then how to move toward them. Let's say right off the bat that all these things are easier said than done and that we know you will have days when you are crossing off wrong approaches rather than finding right ones.

You need:

1) Someone knowledgeable on your side.

2) Medication which will lift the veil of depression and help you take control.

3) A job to get you out of the house and give you money and independence.

4) A new found enjoyment of life.

Now for the steps to get there. Check with your local government to see what programs they have. Check with local churches to see what programs they have. Look in your local paper or internet listings for mental health awareness events. Check with your local hospitals. If all these things fail, call a nearby psychiatrist and ask for advice. I had been to a psychologist who was no help when I finally called my county government and asked for help. They sent me to the psychiatrist who took care of jailed prisoners! He tried 5 antidepressants on me until we found one that worked.

While you are looking for professional help, make a short list everyday of things you want to and can accomplish in a day. Always include a walk or run out in nature. During your outside time concentrate on all the positive things there, the beauty of clouds, plants animals the light of the sun the majesty of the storm. Include on your to-do list things which will increase your sense of mastery of your environment and give you accomplishments. It could be as simple as housework or cooking for the family. Try to increase your to-do list a tiny bit each day. And if you can, have a longer term goal- wanting to paint a room requires cleaning out the room, repairing wall board, priming, masking painting etc. These things will contribute holistically to your recovery.

Find somewhere to volunteer to serve others. If you choose the right charity it will keep your troubles in perspective.

Find a job-the best one you can find whatever that is-and work it like it's your dream job. You'll meet new people and have a little cash. It'll help.

Loving you! Knowing you can do this!
Villianatrix replied to SharonNVirginia's response:
Thank you Sharon, You can't begin to know how much your kind words mean to me!! I am for sure going to try to implement the suggestions that I can but a little more background on my surroundings should help explain the things I can't do. The place I'm living now is in the middle of the woods with very little access to any "government facilities". The nearest city is an hour drive away and always an all day event. My depression makes it hard for me to do a lot in a day. I get too worn out. I'm trying to get on some type of state medical aid program so I can get help but it all takes time........ Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me. I hope you are well! Take care. Nikki
starshineblu responded:
Yes, depression can be very complicated to others, that have
no clue, I been suffering from `it for many years' support
groups help so much or just having someone to talk to that goes through it, you are not alone by far! Perhaps in your
county you can look for Mental Health Support/ they have them at no charge. If you would like to chat or get back to me on that
I'm Your not alone. God Bless.
kbriann replied to starshineblu's response:
Thank you starshine. We all need each other! I have found that seeking Jesus always helps too!

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