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Feeling Stressed and worthless
Abyssx3 posted:
I don't know what to do any more. I'm feeling the full weight of the world on my shoulders. I'm 25 years old married and have a baby girl. I think that my wife might be bipolar or the very least have some sort of anger issues. It's like she's a completely different person when she's mad and she says such hateful cruel things. I'm normally ok at dealing with her when she's like that we might have an exchange or I might get sad during those moments but I can normally manage, lately I haven't been able to handle her behavior like I normally do. I've been stressed from work, finances, and just life in general. A little background, my wife was brought here without proper documentation when she was 2 from Mexico. I been wanting to fix her papers for her but it seems like we're always wasting our money I'm the only one supporting our 3 member household. I understand that she's also stressed she can't work, at least not legally, and can't go to school, and can't even see her elderly parents in Mexico without being able to come back. I feel responsible for not being able to help her with her situation due to finances at least not right now. I also understand that being stuck at home all day is causing her all sorts of stress. But it's really starting to get to me I feel pathetic and worthless and have been having thoughts of harming myself but could never bring myself to do it because of my daughter. I have deadlines due at work that I can never complete, I have a sick mom in need of a kidney transplant, I have a stressed out wife, I have bills to pay and mouths to feed and I just want to shout and cry off the top of my lungs but I can't I just can' t . I feel like I need help but I wish I could just disappear of the face of the planet. But the one things that's keeping me anchored is my daughter I want her to have her dad I want to see her grow I'm not going to give up but I just need to vent. I don't really know what I'm asking for here...I don't have a question.
rohvannyn responded:
Hi there, and welcome. It sounds like you have a really tough situation, it would be difficult for anybody. It really sounds like you could at least use some moral support here, a listening ear, if nothing else. You can definitely have that here. It also sounds like you don't really have a mood disorder or anything like that, it's perfectly natural to feel like you do!

Whatever you can do to take some stress off would be good. Do you have a way of gently encouraging your wife to improve her behavior? She may have problems, but she does have some choice in how she treats you. I'm sure it's very stressful not being able to work. Is there something she could do at home to fill her days a bit and take some of the stress off herself and you? Online translating work, online editing, things like that can even bring in a little money.

Also, there's no shame in asking for help, but I know how people can get sometimes if you do. I imagine you are already cutting the bills down to the essentials. Still, take a look at any other ways to economize, any little bit can help.

If you can find a few minutes in the day to just breathe and be you, even if it's just in the shower or during the drive to work, that will help the stifling trapped feeling. In the meantime, I wish you all the best. Thank you for putting your daughter first. You're a good dad and she'll appreciate it one day.

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