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why is it hard to move on?
jians posted:
I've been living in a critical family since childhood.I never experience to be happy as a child.My mom has been living w/ depression even before i was born.She had few suicide attempts as well.I have seen and felt how that broke each one of us in the family we've been strugling on how we should be dealing to her.She is in denial that she is not "ok".I never heard her say "i love you or im proud of you."in short i never felt to be loved.I am verbally and physically abused ever since i was a kid and till now i am 23 and turning 24 early next month.,When she's depressed she would hurt us,just throw or hit anything she can get hold for.Even my father cannot control her.I know how her condition affects the whole family even though 3 of my other siblings were no longer living w/ us.When i studied in college and has been away from home i somehow missed to have a family specially someone i can call"mother",so right after graduation i came home again,i really thought i have forgiven her because somewhere in my heart do understand what she's going through,i've heard all her heart aches ever since i was a kid so i know where the depression is coming from but..till now specially "now" that am going through depression as well i felt that i can no longer stand her.yesterday for just a simple thing she just screw everything up!she just keeps on talking and talking ans shouting and throwing things at home!she even ran after my father who was suppose to attend a bible study and i was there in the highway as i was on my way in the office,i saw how mad she is to my father of leaving the house.I am very worried right now of what's happening back home.she is surely had hurt my father again.,Im trying to be strong trying to understand her but now that i am personally dealing w/ my own depression as well i dont know how to move on...I am just totally out direction right now.later i would be meeting our pastor to help me out.I am really praying God would give light to all this miseries i have.I felt to be so alone im runing out of srength.Lord help me..
mostloving responded:
hyy how are you?i feel really bad.but you should try to be happy.u have at least family.there are many people.who didn't have any family but they live and happy to. ))) be happy
jians replied to mostloving's response:
am not close to any of my brothers and sisters.,i felt to be a burden now to my church family cause i also run to them everytime,i know i make them worried too much....i dont want to see them hurting.,i felt so much guilt inside..they love me i know that and God as well but i dont know how this feeling of starving for love would go away...i feel so broken and lost...
rohvannyn replied to jians's response:
Always remember this, dear: you don't have to accept being treated that way. Your mother is still your mother, and always will be, but please, see if you can find a way to tell her "no" when she starts mistreating you. Don't let your need for love blind you to the fact that she shouldn't be acting this way. Her personal trauma does not justify this. Knowing that she is not behaving in a sane way, perhaps you can at least know that it's not really about you, it's about her sickness, and maybe you can get a little comfort from that.

Make sure you have some healthy interactions. If you find that at church, fine. If you find that in a walk out in nature, fine. If you find it in a book, that's fine too.

My heart goes out to you.

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