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My heart hurts.
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jlmarine posted:
I am 28 years old and I am suffering from the end of a relationship. We were together for two years. Love of my life, I thought. We moved into our new house in April, and got a dog. We had been engaged for 9 months. We were planning our wedding and family. And then I had to start a third shift rotation at work. I am predispositioned to depression, thus I suppose it was not totally unexpected. My mental illness took me over, and he ended it two after we moved into our home. I now live with my mother and step father. It has been almost three months and I am struggling to move on. I cry daily. It feels as if someone died. And I am in a rut. I see a therapist weekly, but my depression is just there. It feels like it is part of me. And I hate it. I hate myself for this mental illness.
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Alissian responded:
I think your down on yourself in general right now. I went through a very painful break up with the man I thought was the love of my life going on two years ago now. I was devasted and beat myself up for a long time after. It is so painful but it will get better...it will!

Even if you have a disease or made mistakes you can only take responsibility for what you did...not the whole show. Along with having chronic depression I let him make me feel as if I were not good enough. My self esteem really suffered. I am working on that as well as other things like beating depression. I am an alcoholic and addict in recovery and have chronic pain from arthritis. I could hate all these conditions and sometimes do...but when I am calm and sane I realize that I would not have learned to be a better stronger wiser human being if I had not gone through all that I have!!

Hang in there and love yourself!! It will get easier...hugs.
 
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rohvannyn responded:
I completely understand your grief... in a way, a relationship breaking up is much like a death. It's the death of "us" and with it a lot of hopes and dreams you had.

You were working the hardest shift there is, and moving in together is a real test of your relationship. It's hard but better to find out now than ten years down the road. Part of the lack may have been in him also. To give up after only two months of a partner having problems with depression, shows me that he may have had issues of his own.

I can promise you this: with time, it will get better. Let yourself mourn for a bit, but each day try to do a little more. Till then, take care of yourself.
 
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coopysue responded:
am there with you.. My 2 year relationship that seemed like a lifetime committment ended three months ago. she just dumped me. i don't know why. she will not speak to me. I have been in the most horrific depression since the event. I feel I did something horrible, but i don't know what it could be. I am obsessing on the reason, while stumbling through my days in a catatonic manner. I have never felt so alone and miserable in my life. I have dogs, every day I pray they will run away so I am free to end it, and not be responsible for them. i have made a few attempts to talk to the ex, but she will not respond to me. I feel lonely, useless and like i am a horrible person. I did go on effexor, but it shot my blood pressure way up, and gave me constant headaches.i talk to friemds, hotlines,and journal. the hotlines are useless. i have also had the police show up for welfare checks, so i no longer share my angst and suicoide plans because i don't like to come home and find the police here. i am in therapy, and trust my therapist. I am now tryng SAM e, a herbal antidepressant. It has been a week with no results yet. I just want support and to know there are caring, kind people out there.
 
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rohvannyn replied to coopysue's response:
There definitely are people out there who care, and plenty who know something of what you are going through. I've often had trouble with not having anyone to talk to because when I really open up they get really worried. That makes me just clam up, so it's back to the journal. Now that the internet exists, it really gives a much needed way to vent and communicate.


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