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    how do i choose
    avatar
    ripnrun posted:
    why should I have to choose which person to keep in my life? and why aam I being held to. this story is long and complicated. I have been in a realationship for 6 years now and the man im with is my boyfriend/caregiver. I am also a domestic violence survivor, I was beaten and left for dead and had to have brain sujury which left me with a lot for health problems. I lost custody of my children out of all this. now trhat they are adults I have been told that its either them or continuing my relationship. YES we have had our problems. he is the only one who is taking care of me and yes he did slap me durning our last fight. hes not in our home at the moment but he does still come and check on me everyday, everyone around me is mad because I still let him come over. we are starting councling to work on our problems. its not like anyone else is stepping in to help nor have they tried in the past. im only visited when they need something.i do understand the concern about hitting. IM JUST SO CONFUSED AND SCARED ABOUT NOT MAKING THR RIGHT CHOICE. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. am I setting myself up to fail trying to hold onto what was there with him ......or do I go with my kids just so I can be around them?
    Reply
     
    avatar
    fifi834 responded:
    Never EVER choose a man over your children. Ever. Good luck.
     
    avatar
    itmatsb responded:
    You have a problem with choosing men who are physical abusers. Women who are in one abusive relationship tend to find another abuser. And abusers do try to isolate their mates from all others including family members. And why stay with someone who you have fights and problems with? You definitely need to get rid of him NOW before he gets even more abusive and can become a stalker. These kinds of men are often resistant to being dumped and can become violent over it. Have him get anger management therapy. And ask your children or friends to check on you periodically. Surely they can do that. Wish you well.


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