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    My illness is breaking my family and I feel guilty.
    manning18fan posted:
    Hello. I have had depression for 15 years. I am a 28 year old with treatment resistant depression. My brothers and my dad have always been frustrated and unable to understand me. My mom, though she doesn't understand tries to be patient. My brother's have always ganged up on me. Lazy, pathetic, etc... are the common phrases. My doctor and others feel it is emotional abuse. However they don't understand that. They (my brothers) feel like my mother always takes my side. My brother wanted to move back home, and I was fine. Until he started to make comments about me. Well I snapped and said I don't want him home. He left in a huff. Saying he is done with me. My mom is DEVASTATED. I'm stuck. I can't live on my own and I hate that I cause such a divide. I don't know what to do. My family cannot relate to me, and I feel worse when I upset them. Any ideas on what to do. I apologized, but it isn't enough.
    krnlnn responded:
    I am sorry to hear about your troubles and it being the holiday season only makes it more difficult for you I'm sure. From my experience it seems men are less apt to acknowledge that depression real and something we are offtend unable to comtrol. Have you talked with your therapist about this problem? Maybe a few sessions of family counseling could be helpful.
    itmatsb responded:
    It sounds like your family is upsetting you by their rude comments. Have you told your parents that the negative remarks about you make you feel worse? It's too bad that your family doesn't realize that depression is a physical illness. Can't your doctor advise them about that?

    You say that you have treatment resistant depression. I assume that you have tried every anti--depressant out there? Have you gone to a good psychiatrist who knows how to give combinations of medications? Have you tried any MAO Inhibitors? If you have done all of that, have you tried ECT? You have to have tried everything for the sake of your family and most importantly for yourself. Let me know. You take care.
    manning18fan replied to itmatsb's response:
    Thank you all. My mother understands, my brothers feel it is an attitude thing. I have offered to have them come with me to therapy. They do not want to come. I understand their beliefs, however it is maddening that when I offer to have them come and understand they refuse.

    I have tried over 20 (at least) different medications. (They consider it resistant after 6 different medications.) I have tried ECT, and had over 15 sessions of that. For my current treatment I am on 100mg of celexa (the maximum dose they recommend is 40) also I am in therapy. The medicine is keeping the depression somewhat under control, however the therapy is my lifesaver.

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