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Someone help. :(
madyrachel posted:
I'm 14 & my boyfriend is 18. Yes, I know that sounds bad, & I know everyone is going to say "you're too young to know what love is" but you know what? Age has nothing do with love. I love this boy with all my heart, I really do. I've been walked all over & treated terribly my entire life, & I've cut & been depressed, wanted to die & everything in between. But he sees past that and loves me for who I am, not how I used to be. My mum knows he's 18 & can drive, and she was fine with it, up until we officially got together. Then she told me I lied to her & never told her his age or that he could drive. She said to us both that we couldn't see/talk to each other. Yes, I know my mum is just trying to protect me, but I feel that there is a fine lie between protecting me & taking away the one good thing in my life. Yes, I know I have a lot to be thankful for; a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food on my plate, etc., - but all of my life, I've never really felt like I had someone who understood me. That is, until he came along. He understands me, he helps me, he's there for me & he makes me happier than you would't believe. I really don't want to lose him. I wish my mom would just see that I love him, & her telling me that she doesn't want us together isn't just going to make my feelings for him go away. & I also wish she would just realize that taking away the one person that I need is just pushing me to becoming who I used to be. I used to be a depressed girl who cut and felt like suicide was the only way out. But he changed me for the better & made me realize that things can & do get better if you just put your best foot forward and find someone who loves you & cares about you & understands. My entire life, I've been looking for someone like him, & now that I've found him, he's being taken away from me by the one person who should want me to be happy more than anything. & like I said, yes, I know my mum is probably just trying to protect me, but taking away what I need is't protecting me, it's making me feel worse. [br>Also, I don't understand why she won't let me be with him. He's never had sex, ever drank, never smoked cigarettes or done drugs. He's got great grades & he's going to be going to Penn State. He's super respectful & he wouldn't hurt me, & if he did, I know he would take the consequences for it. He has the next few YEARS of his life planned out. He's a good person. I wouldn't ever care if she would only let me see him if it was under her supervision or in her house. Honestly, I wouldn't. I don't care, we have nothing to hide. I just don't want to lose him & I wish she could see that I love this boy with all my heart & soul. I've never felt this way for anyone in my entire life. Sure, him & I may not last, but what if we do? We'll never get the chance to find out if she does this..

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What should I do? How on earth can I convince my mum that he's what I want/need? Please, someone help..
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rohvannyn responded:
If he's worth it, you can wait. If he touches you in a sexual way he will be a criminal in the eyes of the law and you awnt to protect him from that if you love him. If it was meant to be, your love will be as strong as it was before. If it wasn't meant to be, you can still learn some good lessons from it. In the meantime, lies are no way to build trust with your mom. Instead, work on building yourself up as a person, love yourself, and show respect for yourself.

I swear to you, four years is NOT a very long time. It may seem like an eternity right now, I know. You are in control of whether you are depressed, or cut. You have the strength inside you. He is helping you and that's great but he's going to have to do that as a friend until you were older.

I know this isn't what you want, but it would be irresponsible and illegal for your mom to encourage a romantic relationship between you and this young man.

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