someone please help me
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buchacat posted:
I hate my life. I literally hate my life so bad I just want to die. I am so lonely all the time. I have an only child. I have no other family. Well a family that doesn't care if I was dead. So my son has no one. I finally married late 30s because I couldn't stand being alone anymore. I care about my husband but was never in love with him, that's why I got married so late. I really believed I was going to find true love when I was younger and would of had children back then. But I didn't happen for me. So I was only able to have 1 child. I had a miscarriage after him. I cry all the time because of that miscarriage and my son is literally alone like me. I never had true friends either. I had acquaintences. They all have close families and/or more than one child. I have no career either. I come from an abusive childhood where I was verbally and physically abused from my parents and even from 3 of 4 siblings. I am a good person who never hurt anyone. Why am I being punished like this? The phone never rings. I tried suicide once, not 1 sibling even cared. My poor son he is mild autistic and doesn't have any friends. Why was I put on this earth to be punished like this? I never had grandparents either. They all died and 1 committed suicide. My poor son has no family because how my family is. When we die, who is he going to have? How can I be so unlucky? Why can't I just die so I don't have to suffer anymore? Someone please help me!!
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jaljewel responded:
Don't give up. My son is aspergers autistic and has no friends either. I think I enable him not to do things for himself. My family was verbally and emotionally abusive to me too. Now I stay away from them because they only tell me everything I do is wrong and say bad things about me. My son and I started going to this church and I think he has started to make a friend like himself. I don't have a single friend, even my brother won't talk to me. I really think things will get better. You can talk to me if you want, not that that probably helps, but I really think that people do care and your son needs you. I care. Please try not to give up.