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    What do I do?
    avatar
    ringo1968 posted:
    46 year old married father of two (13, 10) here. I'm really riding a roller coaster and I don't know what to do. More and more often I find myself feeling that I just don't care about anything anymore. On one hand, I have a stable, well-paying job with good benefits that is close to home. On the other hand, there is no reasonably possibility of promotion, no one recognizes the good work I do and I'm so bored sometimes I want to walk away and never come back. I love my wife and kids and can't imagine leaving them, but sometimes I get so tired of the routine of family life and all the drama that goes with it. I'm not giving them what they need -- especially my wife (I have sexual performance issues as well) -- and I just feel like I'm doing them more harm than good at this point.

    I've been in therapy on and off for the past 2-3 years. Once ever two weeks for several months at a time. But I don't feel like it's getting any better, and I'm wondering what the point is. I'm not seriously suicidal. I don't really think I could ever do that. But I do feel like everyone would be better off if I just disappeared. I could go live by myself and no one would feel bad about themselves because I'm not able to show them love.

    What do I do?
     
    avatar
    rohvannyn responded:
    First thing I'd do is look for a different therapist or a different method of therapy. I say that because it sounds like what you are doing isn't working very well, and you really deserve to be happy or at least content. Your family would be happier if you were happier, but your quality of life is a really important part of this equation. This is the only life you've got, for now at least.

    I commend you for loving your family... maybe you can use that as fuel for the ability to try. I really understand the part about the job though. Mine is somewhat similar, and I've had to find ways to make it fulfilling for myself. Otherwise it could be absolutely soul-killing. Good luck to you!


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