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    Can't afford therapy but need it
    senzanome posted:
    I've had depression (diagnosed) for 8 years - it runs in my family - and I've dealt well with it taking various meds, currently 200mg of sertraline HCl (Zoloft). However I really wish I could have therapy/counseling, and my doctors have often told me that would be helpful. But while a regular doctor's appointment costs me $30, meeting with a psychiatrist is $250, not covered by my insurance because it's in the same category as drug abuse, as if it's a problem that I myself have caused.

    What can I do? I would really like to talk to someone. I'm a mess right now, sleep all messed up, sometimes sleeping an entire day and missing work, grinding my teeth, neck and back pain, massive headaches, loss of interest, withdrawal from friends and family. A lot of it is stress from external factors, personal disappointments and money worries. But this is really out of character for me. I don't feel suicidal, but my boss was telling me he felt really worried about me and didn't want anything bad to happen to me. Wondering what he must think, I looked up the warning signs of suicide, and they all fit me really well. No wonder he feels worried.

    I don't know what to do. I wish mental healthcare and health insurance were different in this country, but there's not much I can do to change that right now.

    I can't cope. Like I said, I don't feel suicidal, but I wish the world would disappear.
    Purr1955 responded:
    Hi! First of all, you're fortunate to have a boss who cares about you. I have a lot of similar issues and I lost my job about a year ago. I'm on temporary disability (state-run here in California) and my benefits are going to run out soon. I know my depression contributed to me getting laid off, but I never "trusted" my boss enough to let him know what was going on. Anyway, enough about me. I just wanted to let you know that I know what it's like to worry about money....cause now, on disability I'm living at poverty level.

    You do need to have support. Sites like this can be helpful but talking to people in person is better, and in my opinion, indispensable. You really need to rally yourself and reach out to people. I've done this recently -- even called up old friends I hadn't been in touch with for years -- and told them honestly what's going on. Therapy is definitely called for, for you, but again I have a similar problem. I've had some good therapy in the past but can't afford it right now. I know when one is depressed it's extra-hard to even look for things; to investigate, make the phone calls and all that.

    Please know there are many people who are dealing with similar stuff. Do you have any family member(s) to talk to. Actually, start with family if you can....unless they're awful and don't understand about depresssion. But you said it "runs in my family" so I would think that there would be at least one relative who has understanding and who would care enough about you. Don't worry about leaning too much on someone. Let them know you NEED to lean on them in order to get help.

    I understand the feeling of wishing the world would disappear, for me it has been "I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up." That's not being "actively" suicidal, but shows how much pain we've been in. Don't give up. You probably should talk to your prescribing physician about what you're going through. I know medical appointments tend to be rushed. Make little notes if you have to, so you can remember what you want to tell your doc during the appt. I do that, and I'm not embarrassed about it; I even had one doctor tell me it was a good idea.

    Your insurance coverage is bad.....not covering therapy, wow, that's awful, and it's not right. A combination of medication and therapy is the standard method for treating depression in the U.S. (I don't know about other countries.)

    Try to find a support group to attend in person. Online communities are fine, but you're sitting in front of a computer screen. You need to be in the same room with other warm bodies! If you are with warm, caring people, that alone can help you to feel better and not feel like you're alone with your problem.

    Best of luck to you. "Purr"
    taterbug1949 responded:
    Have you tried looking in your phone book for the local Mental Health Center? Most counties have one. It may not be in your own town but maybe one nearby. Also many psychologists have a sliding scale so that they do not charge as much. The first one I went to only cost $40 a visit. If you are getting meds from a doctor already you may only need a counselor. My counselor's charge is only $150. But I do have Medicare and a secondary insurance and They only pay $93 which is divided between the two of them.

    I hope you find one soon that you can afford because they are very helpful.

    kkoenig1 responded:
    Hello, I understand what you are saying as I am there too! One thing that helped me a little is a medicine called Cymbalta, ask your doctor about it. I read that Zoloft can intensify suicidal thoughts and signs in teens and young adults. I have alot of medical issues to go along with the depression which makes it even worse for me. I don't sleep either and it is hard to function. No one can understand unless they have been there. I started scrapbooking and that helps keep my mind busy. Try finding a hobby you can relax at. Feel better soon!

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