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    A cry for help.
    az330 posted:
    [TRIGGER] I feel so depressed tonight. This has been a tough week. I just can't get out of this hole I feel I am in. My trust and faith in people is gone. I really hate life right now. I feel all this pressure in my chest. How do I release what I am feeling. I feel so alone. So lost. I wish I could end it all.
    alleiebee responded:
    wow i have been there and it is a hard road. some days still feel like that. i call those my survival days. when i just go into survival mode i eat and sleep through the day because that is all i can do. There are others out there in your position you are not alone. just put one foot in front of the other and go to your doctor and get help!! they can help you. its not a quick fix there is never a quick fix for anything. but please go to you rdoctor or local emergency room someone will be there to listen not everyone is bad. i promise.
    susiemargaret responded:
    hello, AZ --

    how are you feeling today? better, i hope. just making it thru the night is an accomplishment sometimes.

    do you feel up to writing us thruout the day? i will be on the computer on and off all day and tonight and will check in on you whenever i am.

    ending it is not the answer; you know this. that thought is only a thought, you don't have to act on it. it is not even your true self speaking, it is your depression lying to you. acknowledge that it is there as a thought, but then set it aside and move on.

    i send you many caring thoughts and hope you can get some rest today.

    -- susie margaret
    what good is gold, or silver too, if your heart's not good and true -- hank williams, sr.
    susiemargaret responded:
    hello again, AZ --

    how are you doing?

    -- susie margaret
    what good is gold, or silver too, if your heart's not good and true -- hank williams, sr.
    az330 replied to susiemargaret's response:
    am still here. my heart is bleeding with pain. i just dont see the light at the end of the tunnel.
    marysings replied to az330's response:
    AZ - I am sorry to read that you are still struggling minute to minute.

    Whan I have been like that, my T and I meet more than just one session a week. I've even been in his office three times in one week when I was struggling. Can that happen for you?

    Soft Hugs AZ
    I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
    az330 replied to marysings's response:
    [TRIGGER] Mary-
    I feel like I haven't had a moment to rest. The past couple months have been nonstop. I have been in an out of the hospital a couple times. My health has been a little shaky. My body is finally back to normal.
    I have been working on some major issues with my tdoc. I am already going twice a week. I am just tired. Tired of feeling all of these harsh feelings. I am working thru alot of anger. My anger scares me. I keep shutting down. Ending it seems like a good solution to all my problems. I just want to stop the hurt.
    Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to az330's response:
    Dear AZ,

    It's now a full day later... how are you doing? I know you're tired, and I know you want to rest.

    Please call a crisis line if you need help keeping yourself safe. It won't always be this hard, dear one. Please get the help you need and deserve.
    sos2011 responded:
    i've been depressed most of my life. my husband committed suicide 34 yrs. ago. my one year old and i witnessed it and i was 5 months pregnant. i still love him with all my soul and not a day goes by i don't think of him. life went on and i've been beyond sad ever since. i've tried every kind of pill, therapy, electro convulsive therapy, hypnotherapy you name it. finally i turned to GOD. i pray and pray and pray. i go to church by myself and it's the only place i find peace.
    this is my life in a much more PAIN since then and now. please have trust in a psychiatrist and a therapist. and mostly just talk to GOD. he actually has answered many prayers. i had never been a believer. i have felt everything you feel and sometimes still do. i take MANY medications and just hope for the best. i've learned that my depression and things i've gone through will never go away, i just have to learn to live with it. i'll be checking back with you.

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